A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Dear CupidI was in a layoff situation, and my bf (of 3 years) told me he can find some position in his company and he did and i got a job there through his recommandation.His work collegues does not know im his gf which is fine with me. But they know he really talked to a lot of guys to get me this job and im his friend.He now tells me that im not even supposed to even glance at his side when im at office, no talking not even formal hello. It hurts that he wont recognize me even as an acquaintance at office. He says that i should do this cause he helped me in getting the job.I know im grateful to him for getting work for me, but i dont want him to use this everytime i try to ask him something. BTW his office policy is not against dating among office colleagues, actually two of his colleagues were actually dating and have set the date for wedding too.Am i making an issue out of nothing. Please help me.
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (4 April 2013):
 He probably had to lie about why he recommended you. It's not a great recommendation if he said "give her a job because she's my girlfriend". He probably worked you up and said a lot of great things about you, and my guess is that if he said you were his girlfriend they'd think he was just making up what a great employee you are.
So I'm thinking he probably told some lies to his bosses or whoever he talked with, telling them how he knows you, yet making it seems he is distant enough from you to be an objective person to recommend you.
So, if people found out you are his girlfriend it'd come out that he lied, and it would put him in a bad position.
Ask him why he doesn't want anyone to know. I don't understand why you haven't been able to get an explanation from him?
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (4 April 2013):
 I got my ex husband a job where I work... he doesn't want anyone to know he's my ex and has asked me not to tell them.
It makes no sense to me either but I respect it.
I can see him not wanting PDA and such... but to totally ignore you at work seems silly.
do you live together? do you drive to work together?
do you have lunch together?
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