A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have lied to my boyfriend about not having sex with my ex as i was afraid that he would dump me. Right now, he has found out somehow and i need a solution to make up for this big mistake or he'll never come back to me. Please help me with the huge soultion to make up for this terrible mistake.
View related questions:
my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2007): Akhere,
Why in the heck should she apologize to this boy for something that happened BEFORE SHE EVEN MET HIM?
There is no way on God's green earth that she should tell him she is sorry for something that is none of his business! Its not as if she cheated on her current boyfriend.
True, she should not have lied to her boyfriend, I'll grant that. However, he sounds immature and insecure.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2007): There is 'no' solution to a non-existing problem. The only thing that is in existance is your bf's insecurities and his ultra sensitivities towards something that CAN NEVER be changed. It is a thing of the past. If he cannot get over that, then that is HIS PROBLEM. If you're afraid of losing someone who is so mentally instable, then you deserve to be sucked into his whirlwind of immaturity.
In short, you need not do anything. This is HIS problem. Not yours. If I were there, I would smack him upside the head for being such an immature little jerk.
...............................
A
female
reader, Nikita  +, writes (16 January 2007):
 I see well in that case, you havent done anything wrong if it was before you met him. I think he's feeling a bit insecure here and needs to realise that you have a past and you cant change it. Why would it be any of his business anyway for you to be afraid to tell him? I dont tell my partner about my exs and our sex lives. its in the past and it should stay there. Tell him, you lied becasue you were afraid of his reaction and you were right and that he has no cause to feel this way because you're with him now and you're not going to go back to your ex or cheat on him at all. If he doesnt believe you then I dont feel that you could have a relationship with this boy because he sounds too insecure. Good luck.
...............................
A
male
reader, Dagwood  +, writes (16 January 2007):
 Hi Anon, Well just read the 2nd part to your story! It's no so bad after all! If this happened before you 2 got together then your current boyfriend can't say anything! You had no commitment to each other so you were not unfaithful. The fact that you omitted to tell him was probably to protect his feelings? Tell him why you did it! If he does not except it he's probably just looking for an excuse to get out of the relationship without feeling guilty. In which case you should move on too! Keep me posted. Take care. Dagwood
...............................
A
male
reader, Dagwood +, writes (16 January 2007):
Hi Anon. Seem to have got yourself into a pickle! If he knows about it then there is no magic bullet to avoid the issue. You've done something wrong now you have to face up to your responsibilities! Tell him what you did and try explaining why you did it! I would suggest that you have a break to find out what YOU really WANT out of a relationship or do you want one at all! This will give him time to think about it too. If he forgives you and you guys stay together... learn from this mistake. This type of behaviour will not only get you a bad reputation but will slowly make you lose your self respect/esteem. Be faithful, it's the only way! Good luck!
...............................
A
female
reader, Nikita +, writes (16 January 2007):
Hi there, well if you want him back you're going to have to be prepared to do a lot of apologising and bending over backwards to please him. You've hurt him and betrayed him badly so at the moment he's not going to in much of a forgiving mood but if he still cares for you, he may, just may give you another chance if you can prove to him that you wont ever do it again and that it was a moment of stupidity that wont be repeated. There is no easy solution to this im afraid because you cant turn back the clock but you can try and make things better by proving that he can trust you again. if all your efforts are in vain and he doesnt believe that you wont do it again, then Im afraid you're going to have to let him go. Hope it all works out for you.x
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2007): Well mistake is made and it is make forever... the only solution for you now is going to him and tell him you are sincerely sorry for what happend before he rise such accuciasion to you... Any way there would a be a better solution to this, but that will be private issue and if you intent knowing what the solution is please send me a private mail so that we can talk.... hope this will help you.
Master Advicer
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi i'm the one who posted this question but it didn't come out so clear so, i'm here to help.
No i didn't cheat on him. This happened before i met him but i was afraid to tell him when we got together. So when he knows about it now, he is extremely frustrated and will not forgive me. So, he wants a solution and also, wants me to make it up to him. HELP!
...............................
|
