A
female
age
30-35,
*ldomingo
writes:hi.i've been with my boyfriend now for about 8 months and we love each other more than anything. we have sex on a regular basis and it is amazing but he has never ejaculated, not once. he says he can on his own through masturbaion and i know he has with a previous girlfriend because he got her pregnant. he says it's amazing and the best he's ever had and he gets 'the feeling' but then it just goes, usually for no reason. sex can last for anything up to 5 hours and i know it's obviously really frustrating for him and it is for me too. am i doing something wrong? and what can i do to help? i love him more than anything and i really want to help him.any advice would be much appreciated. thanks :)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2010): There is a possibility that he may be subconsciously (or consciously) not cumming inside you because of his pregnancy scare. Even if the girl's pregnancy was not carried to term it's still a serious scare for a guy his age.
A
male
reader, Bupe +, writes (17 March 2010):
Dear Eldomingo,You are definitely not doing anything wrong. This is an issue that a small number of couples experience but can be resolved. I would put it down to delayed ejaculation. This is not a physical problem but more psychological. In your case this can either be down to the fact your partner got his last girlfriend pregnant, or the routine of his masturbation. If the pregnancy previously was unwanted this may be playing on his mind without him even knowing; and if he masturbates regularly that has become his most comfortable way of ejaculating. Again, he won't be aware of such things as its just a matter of habit. There is no immediate way to cure this but you should continue to try and perhaps take it slower. He must be made to feel totally comfortable and make this obvious. Put less pressure on eventually orgasming and just go through intercourse and see what happens. The fact you have sex on a regular basis may add to the pressure. If all fails some form of sex therapy would be advised and is widely available but I hope you reach a satisfactory conclusion without the need of it. All the best.
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