A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been with this guy for 3 years. Lived together (with parents) for 1 1/2 years. I go to texas for a week with family and during this time he tells me that he cant do it anymore and tells me he is moving out. He still loves me but his heart is "hard" so I gave him his space, we were getting along good. Then all of the sudden he starts dating this girl who looks just like me and has my name and we even have the similar personalities. And he is now acting mad at me even though I have done nothing wrong to him during our break up but be nice, no matter how hard it has been. It doesnt make sense. What is going through his head with this new girl (my double) and does it mean he isnt over me?
View related questions:
broke up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2013): The girl has similar traits, but she has something you're lacking. So he thinks. It doesn't matter what it is. He has made it clear that you're not the one he wants. So I'll try to help you to understand.It is obvious that he likes your looks and personality. This means he has a "type" of girl that suits his fantasies. He accepted you for a while; because he had everything he thought he wanted. But...something was missing. He is over you. The other girl has the look, personality, and something he didn't find in you. That doesn't mean you aren't good enough. Young love just doesn't last very long. It doesn't make any sense. It's really not supposed to. You're still in the early stages of maturing to adulthood. You're still growing, and your mind has not developed to an adult-level of understanding. Emotionally, you are still a child. Sad to say, too many of us adults stay that way. His behavior means he is a superficial person. He wasn't really in love with you. He liked your "image" and you had some of the things he was looking for in a girl at the time. That, and the fact that he is stupid and selfish. It will come back to bite him in the ass someday. Treating you as he has isn't right. There's karma for all we do to harm others. You don't shop for people like a pair of shoes or a hat, and throw them away when you find what you perceive to be a better purchase. However; you must learn that all relationships in your young life are not permanent. They are trial relationships until the right guy for you comes along, and you are both mature enough to keep the relationship going. He evidently isn't. So do your best to get over him.Start by focusing on yourself. Hangout with your friends.Have some fun. Flirt with other guys. Do the things that make you feel young and happy. Throw away everything that reminds you of him, or put it all away out of sight. Don't text him, don't call him, and leave him alone altogether.Feel good in knowing, he has a replica and not the original.How do you think she feels when she sees she is a cheap rip-off of his ex? Don't even get it in your head that youweren't good enough. He is a silly young boy. Just a boy.Boys at your age aren't as emotionally attached or intense as girls. They chase after fantasy figures. Not real people.It takes time and experience to know what we truly want.You'll soon get over him. Don't be taunted by his choices.It makes you feel rejected and falling below his standards.Any guy who would treat a girl like he does, deserves to be another girl's problem. He'll hurt the other girl too; because he doesn't know any better...yet. When his heart gets broken, he'll surely remember you. By that time, you'll be long gone. You'll just remember a few good things, and the bad things will help you get over him.Be thankful that you're young and have a long life ahead of you. You'll also meet guys you'll want to breakup with; until you find the one that is right for you. That is what real life is like. You have learned how it feels to hurt someone who likes you. Now you will treat people as you would want to be treated; if you have to let them go.It's tough now. It only gets better as time goes by. You have to have a few heartbreaks to make you a stronger woman. It doesn't get easier, you just learn how to survive the pain better and move on.
|
