A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ive asked for help on this before but the situations worsened and now i reaaaaaaly dont know what on earth to do!See, thing is. Ive been with my boyfriend for three months, i feel as though fate has set us up to be together and ive FINALLY found a decent guy. Hell hes seen me vomit, cry, laugh, have a panic attack, high, stoned, pissed, be rreally ill and rushed into hospital and weve had a pregnancy scare and moved in together all in that short space of time. Oh and weve met each others families too. Insane, i know. Ive told him pretty much everything there is to tell and yet hes still around which i am amazed at. Honestly, he does seem to be absolutely perfect for me and i look at him and feel so proud to be with him. But the issue is this. His friend. I think i'm falling for his friend. I get along with his friend sometimes more than i get along with my bf, we flirt like craaazy, hang out alot and im really falling for him (it wasnt too bad at first but is getting to that point where hes on my mind alot) I dont just have some psyched little crush on him either, we really open up to each other, i feel insanely comfortable around him and there is a mental chemistry between us. I feel this weird sort of connection between us and i just want him around allll the time. I think my boyfriend knowws somethings going on, well my friend picked up on it. My bf seems a little jealous of how much i get along with his friend, and how much his friend makes me laugh. And rightly so, if he flirted even half as much with one of my friends i'd be insanely jealous and get reaaaaally pissed off. But i cant help the way i feel! I'm starting to believe i feel stronger about his friend than i do him.Well his friend has all the qualities i feel i need in a man. The main ones been adventure, humour and really not having a care in the world. And trust me-this guy fits them all. I think about him when im down and instantly am happy. He shares my views and opinions, and i dont know if ive ever loved someones company so much! So now i dont know what to do. I love my bf i really do and i know how good ive got it. But im been madly distracted by his friend and i mean madly. And i really wanna be with his friend (and can tell hes into me too) Its all so wrong on soo many levels and i never want any harm to come to my bf and i know that his friend would feel it wrong too. But noone can deny this isane chemistry! I mean, i cant carry on like this. I cant lie to my bf. I wanna be with them both really, but im no cheat. Aaarghh help im so confusedd!
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crush, flirt, jealous, moved in Reply to this Question
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female
reader, QuirkLady  +, writes (13 June 2009):
 Well, if you want to make it work with your boyfriend you'd limit your time around his friend. No sense playing with fire if you don't want to get cooking. There is also a possibility that you are being tested; his friend could be testing you to see how good a girlfriend you are to his friend and he's really not that interested in you at all. On top of that, if you do leave your boyfriend for his friend, he will have reason not to trust you since you'd have proven yourself to be weak-willed.
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