A
female
age
30-35,
*onfusedlover10
writes:Me and my boyfriend have been together for 10mths now. He cheated on me in the past and i forgave him for it and said that we could start over because i really love him with all of my heart. Although i forgave him, things haven't been the same and just recently he wanted to go on a "break". I've never been on a break before so I dont really know the rules. Im afraid that this is just a way to break up with me, even though he said we would never be apart lastnite. I dont wanna go on the break because im afraid that he will have sex with another girl even though we both promised that we wouldn't. I feel like the whole time during this break im gonna be wondering what he's doing, whose he with, and where's he at and I dont wanna be stressed out.
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female
reader, xanthic +, writes (19 June 2011):
 Usually when men say they want a 'break', it really means 'I want your permission to cheat, but I still want to have you as a backup in case things don't work out with another girl'. Considering the fact that he's already cheated on you in the past, I wouldn't be surprised if this is his reason for wanting a break. As the other poster said, you can suggest rules, but honestly I don't think that's going to help the situation. You'll still be wondering about what he's doing regardless of what he agrees not to do. Actions speak much louder than words, he can tell you everything you want to hear but at the end of the day, you still won't be able to trust him.
I don't believe in breaks, honestly. Either break up or stay together and work things out, and let that be the end of it. You may love him, but accepting this behavior does nothing but teach him he can get away with almost anything. Don't let him walk all over you.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (18 June 2011):
 the rules of your break are what you make them.when my bf and I took a break (which lasted a whole week) one of our rules was no sex with anyone else... we both agreed to it.... not knowing now long this break would be...so your break means your rules... you have to talk about it.
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