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The boy I fancy has a girlfriend, but he still flirts with me!

Tagged as: Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 February 2005) 40 Answers - (Newest, 26 May 2009)
A , anonymous writes:

Dear Cupid,

There is this guy at my school and we have flirted in the past and we still are but he has a girlfriend.We still call each other and text each other. When he is with his girlfriend he looks at me and smiles back.He has leaned in to kiss me once before but i pushed him away, what should i do?

View related questions: flirt, has a girlfriend, text

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A female reader, princesscutie United States +, writes (26 May 2009):

well what you should do is tell to stop flriting with you cause he has got a girlfriend and then see what happens from there good luck

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2009):

Ok here's what you do I have had this happen to me before and it's a really hard position to be in. Because the boy likes you tell him how you feel about him but if you want to have a relationship he has to break up with his girlfriend. Because he wants to kiss you should tell him you want to take some time before that so his ex won't get mad.

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A female reader, Cupid123 United Kingdom +, writes (6 May 2009):

omg i hav like the same thing happen to me its really annoyin because of his girlfriend its this boy his name is scott ilove him to bits well he hasent kissed me or nuffin but i had pen on my face 1 time and i asked him where bout it was and he licked his jumper sleave and wiped it off for me i was like awww thats sweeet lol!! xx

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2009):

same, this is happenning to me aswell. but the girl doesnt go to the same school as me. he always touches me. and teases and uses every chance he gets to get close to me. i like him but he has a girlfriend and if he cant respect her then how will he respect you? i think you need to talk to him face to face to sort this out, so nobody gets hurt!

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A male reader, treehugger United States +, writes (20 March 2009):

This guy has a girlfriend and you need to respect that. Ask him why he is flirting with you when he is already taken. If he is doing it to his girlfriend, he will do it to you if you hook up. Boys like this want the stability of a relationship but the freedom to play around. If his girlfriend is smart, she will dump him and then watch how fast he goes running back. Hopefully she will not have him and neither should you.

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A female reader, pamina United Kingdom +, writes (9 January 2009):

i think you should get cloes to him and let him kiss you then ignor him for 2week and see if he flows you and smiles at you and looks at you if he des he truley loves you

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2008):

This happened to me recently.

I was at my friends house for her birthday party, we all got a bit tipsy, and we started making out with eachother in a circle. The guy who I fancy wasn't tipsy, but I was, and he carried me out onto the front lawn and started trying to kiss me. I know it was wrong because he has recently hooked up with one of my schoolfriends little sisters, so I kinda pushed him away.

But later when we were playing this game, he kept sitting next to me, and we got off about twice. But then when people started to leave, he kept coming back and just kissing me lightly.

I know that he wants to break up with his girlfriend, but I'm really confused as to what to do because he KEEPS flirting with me! I dont know what to do either...

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A female reader, lizzyhook2 United Kingdom +, writes (19 October 2008):

lizzyhook2 agony auntHey Cupid

I Need Your Help I Realli Like This Guy And He Likes Me Bk But Hes Got A Girlfriend And He Won't Dumped He Because She Mad In The Heas Wot Do I Do?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2008):

hey i jus wanted to tell you that im going through the same dam thing now i was talking to this boy for 5 months now wen i had a boyfriend and i had start feelinn and at the time he also had a girl now im single he has another girlfriend and he led me to think that he liked me even though he still like me, and he still flirts with me and he kissed me three times and i liked it alot but his girlfriend is in the way he talk to me on the phone more and were always in the hall way toghter i jus dont know what to do anymore i want to wait but im getting impaient and i get very jealous wen there together i really dont think that he likes her that much anyway cause you dont never see them toghter that much and we talk on the phone from 10:00 till maybe 1:30 2:00 in the morning i know intense right i jus dont know what to do i need so advice and i dont want to break them up but i will if i have to i jus hate not getting what i want i jus dont understand y did he go from one girl to another like that i thought that wen they brike up that we were going to be toghter i mean i should him all of the sings so he cant say that i did notits jus crazy i mean wht is it and the even funnyer thing is that he always talk about being with me calling me his boo and his girlfriend and shit like that and he switched his name in ma phone to MY BOO yes MY BOO crazy right i need help bad HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP MEEEEEEEEEEE

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2008):

I think you should talk to him about it. It depends if you really like him or not really. It's as simple as telling him how you feel.. weather you get your way with him or not you'll have his answer, and know how he feels about you. Don't hit yourself later if he doesn't like you, cause chances are you'll find another guy soon enough!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 April 2008):

the same happened to me last week !

my advice is to let him no how you feel about him but also tell him u dont want to ruin his and his girlfriends relationship he is in , i have just found out he has a gf and whilst ritting this i feel heartbroken inside as i realy fancy him -xx- i hope my advice helps x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2008):

Well, Im kinda in the same boat.

The guy I like flirts with me at lunch and we hug forever and it seems so perfect and I get so jelouse when I see the picture of his girl on his myspace, or when his mood updates say "I miss my baby girl" but Before he asked her out he told me he didnt want a girlfriend, but he still is him.

But Excuse my language but my friend who has known him since 6th grade, Said "He always has some trick on his dick" and this is now our Junior year. But, I've almost got him.

SO I SAY! Keep him on the hook, keep him interested, but wait it out, dont push him too far and MAKE Him break up with her, because your ending wont be very happy if you do that and push him away. Keep it flirty and Sexy and maybe he'll come around, if not, Screw him and find somone that deserves you!

My mom always says, "If you cant have the one you love, love the one your with"

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2008):

well, if he leaned in to kiss you and he has a girlfriend, chances are he is a player; steer clear. but styaing friends with him is cool, just don't fall for him.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2008):

i have dha same exact problem as yhu..and sadly im going thru it rite now, it hurts alot. see my story is the guy i like has a gf but he told my friend he does like me but not to tell me..but she did anywayz..so im like if he likes me why does he have a gf? and she told me its either, 1.hes tryna make me jelouse or 2. hes confused or 3. hes jus messin with her. dha last time i saw him he told me out of nowhere how much he loved his gf..i was already mad at him and he had to make it worse by sayinq dhat.. and he even asked me if i liked him but i didnt say anythin...but my advice to yhu is just wait time will tell yhu..and if yhure waitin and yhu find another guy..dont let it pass yhu by cuz maybe he aint dha one for yhu...

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2008):

What happens if he flirts with you, and you can tell that he really isn't enjoying the company of his girlfriend anymore. He stops answering her calls when hes with friends because its like she has him on a radar and always wants to know where he is , who hes with, and what he is doing, and then theres you who will give him the space and the time he wants with maybe just the guys or whatnot. You can tell that there is something there between you and him, other people have noticed it too. Could he be just affraid to move on in his life, and let the other girl go because he doens't want to hurt her?

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A female reader, hpgirl United States +, writes (18 January 2008):

I need alot of help the boy i love flirts with my best friend i get extermly jealous because she flirts back why is he doing this? help!!!!

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A female reader, hpgirl United States +, writes (17 January 2008):

I have the same problem. my guy friend was about to kiss me to but i pushed him away. i need some help 2

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2007):

Hey!!

i think he likes you but you should mess with his mind make him think you love him one day then the next day be all like, "i don't need you i'm over you" and see what he does!!! does he try to flirt with you even more or does he not even care!!! try it!! it works every time!!:)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2007):

stay away from him he is not single

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2007):

Hey there! Well I thik you should confront him with his behaviour! Because karma comes back around twice as hard..I mean to get the point he could be flirting with you for now and then broke up with his girlfriend and then there's ma possibility if he was flirting with another girl you be the one getting hurt. I suggest you go and tell the girlfriend of his behaviour

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2007):

i think that you should just leave him alone and then once you find out he doesn't have a girlfriend ask him before he askes anther girl.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2007):

Hey,

So I went through the same thing. The guy that flirted with me was my best guy friend. I had known him since iwas in 3rd grade, in 8th now. We'll wen i liked him i rote him a note and told him how i felt. He was totaly kool bout it. He said he had felt the same way also and thot that we shuld hook up.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2007):

tell his girlfriend 2 break up with him if he tried 2 kiss you

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2007):

im in the same situation i like this guy but he has a girlfreind and everyones tells me all he wants is sex but i had already told him i wanted to take it slow and now it seems he wants her but when we hang out hes all over me telling me he likes me but doesnt want to hurt her and wnats me to wait until they brake up but not sure i can i do like him and would do enything to be wit this guy as long as he respects my property. so what i did was stopped calling him and wait for him to chase me and thats what use should do show them u dont care enymore what they do it drives the boys crazy

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2007):

i have the same problem,he even tells me that he loves me but if he does, then why is he still with her. the problem is that with him, i dont know where i stand anymore- harmless flirting has got more serious but i still think that he is using me. use my advice and start freah with him- get to know him from the start, it might help

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2007):

i am in the same situation, i have fallen hard and fast for this guy and he has had a gf for almost a year but he keeps flirting with me and the other night we were hanging out and he kissed me and it wasnt just once.. it was lots through the night and i feel terrible because of his girlfriend but i like him sooooo much.... so trust me, i know what you're going through and sometimes just kissing him and seeing if he pulls away means nothing as in my case....

good luck though,

xo

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2007):

he is centainly not the type that can be trusted, if he have the adosity to flirt with you and have a girlfriend he'll do the same to you!!!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2007):

he is centainly not the type that can be trusted if he have the gutts to flirt with you and has a girlfriend already he'll do the same to you!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2007):

don't buy it he is just interested in you for one thing (sex) then he will probbly be still inloved with the girl he has right now

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2007):

I am in the situation i really like this boy but he has a girlfriend and is flirting with me.i think you should tell him he already has a girlfriend and to back-off

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2007):

i have just started working at a place, and this lad that also works ther has started to flirt with me..he has told me that he has feelings for me and i to him, but i havnt actually told him..it must be obvious anyway! he always says really sweet things to me that just makes my heart skip! im not sure if its a crush, but he has a girlfriend they have been together for a while, and as mush as i would love it, i would feel so bad for the girl if they broke up..im so tempted to act on my feelings but i dont want to push him away! help!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2007):

"The boy I fancy has a girlfriend, but he still flirts with me!"

As i write this I need the same answer.The guy I had a thing for also has a Girlfriend. hes 22 & am 21. we live in the same flat. so his Girlfriend who is also 22 is round our flat quite alot.

the thing was I noticed he kept staring at me last year,I asked him for a dance at our local night club & got him talking to me. I found out this year he has a girlfriend.

so I have sopken to him really or danced with him. I think his girlfriend know I like her man! but honestly I think you should just forget him and move on.

there is nothing you can do untill he tells you that he is single.

I dont know if you see him everyday..but because i live with the guy I like "alot" its very akward.

I have just had to forget that I even fancy him & find someone else.its hard but its the only way to go.

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A female reader, sexylove +, writes (19 July 2006):

i have a simalar problem to you...first off i have liked this boy for ages and met him when he was sort of seeing another girl he used to flirt with me all the time...then i found out he and this girl had gone out one night and ended up now as boyfriend and girlfriend.. i got really annoyed actually as he still flirts with me but now hes strange he flirts with me sometimes then other times hes not interested i dont know where i stand i would appreciate some advice....

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2006):

listen... You should tell him that you like him and you want to be with him and the only way that he would be able to flirt with you is to leave his girlfriend and come to you. then give him resons why(if he askes for them)or(if hes leaning towards his girlfriend and not you)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2005):

Goover to him one day and you kiss him and if he backs away pull him over to the side and tell him youre sorry.Its always worth a try! Good Luck!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2005):

Do what youre heart tell you to do,no one else in this world but you can make this choice.What ever you decide in the end im sure youre thinking about who could get hurt.If you choose that you want him to leave his girlfriend, put youre self in her shoes when she finds out who you are and how she never suspected that all the love they shared for one other was all a lie and it included a nother girl...

This is the answer i should really be choosing for my self as i am in the same suituationa as you.I know its hard,but if its that hard talk to this guy as i think i will be doing so.Goodluck...................Tatiana, Melb

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A reader, Sarah, writes (13 February 2005):

Dear The boy I fancy,

I have been in a situation similar to the one that you are in...but a little different.I have started to fancy my friend's ex-boyfriend...and he

flirts with me a LOT.

Just put yourself in his girlfriend's shoes. Ask yourself how SHE would feel if anything happened between you and her boyfriend. Then,just follow your heart. Most likely,it will lead you to do what is right.

Good luck,

Sarah

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2005):

If he will cheat with you or leave her for you he is NO GOOD. You cannot trust a man like that EVER. Once a cheat always a cheat. You better look around and find somebody who deserves you. A leopard doesnot change his spots. He would only do the same thing to you.

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A reader, Dominique McDonald, writes (13 February 2005):

No matter how tempting it is, do not get involved with this guy if he is still with his girlfriend.

If he really likes you he will break up with her to be with you.

If he doesn't want to break up with her it means that he wants to be with her.

If anything happens between the two of you and they are still together you will get hurt and so will she - he will have the best of both worlds which is wrong. He needs to be shown that he must choose. You have to show him this. Good luck!

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A female reader, Bev Conolly Australia +, writes (13 February 2005):

Bev Conolly agony auntThis boy sounds like he needs some space to grow up and learn that he's not the centre of the universe.

You say that he has a girlfriend and that he still flirts with you, but how would you feel if you were his girlfriend and he was flirting with somebody else? Pretty upset, I think, and understandably!

You and he can be friends, can still talk and text, but you shouldn't be flirting and trying to tempt him into a romance with you. It's unfair to the girlfriend he has already. If he wants to have an exclusive relationship with you, then he needs to (gently!) break up with his girlfriend beforehand.

But here's a word of warning: this guy has already shown that he's not too scrupulous about playing around when he's actually with someone. So, if you do start going out with him, you may find yourself being the girlfriend that gets ignored while he smiles and flirts with some other girl!

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