A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Please help!!!! Trying to figure out what to use for my first time... Am on the pill and would like to know a little extra about spermicide and the sponge.Spermicide...Everything says not to douche/rinse for 8 hours afterwards.How does one douche? Do you NEED to rinse afterwards? How do you rinse it out?Can you get it out without doucing? If so, how?Can you leave it in for longer than 8 hours?What are the dangers of douching?The sponge...How long does it need to be left in? How long can it be left in? Do you need to rinse out?How serious and common is the increased the risk for urinary tract infection, toxic shock syndrome, vaginal infection or inflammation of the cervix? And how much is the risk increased? How much results in these symptoms?What about combining one of these with the use of the pill?We will only have sex after we have both been tested and are completely STD free. We are both virgins. Does this make a difference to use of the sponge or spermicide?
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both virgins, cervix, sperm, std, the pill, vagina Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, OhGetReal  +, writes (9 August 2010):
 I did answer your original question. If you are on the pill and taking it properly then it is 99.9% effective against pregnancy. You do not need spermicide and the sponge on top of it, it's messy and an added expense.
I am not a physician, however, so if you want a professional opinion, please make an appointment with an ob/gyn. I would recommend you do that anyway as you are a female of reproductive age and you should be getting pap smears regularly once a year.
I am comorted to hear that your boyfriend is capable of financially supporting a child, however, that is only a what if. What if he doesn't want to marry you if you get pregnant, you then are a single mom. But, it seems that you have your birth control taken care of which is a responsible thing to do on your part, so you should be fine. I still think you are a bit young, and you are still at a higher risk of getting HPV simply because you are young. I know a 19 year old girl who had sex once with a boyfriend and she now has cervical cancer (from the virus) and I think that is very sad that she is so young and has cancer. If I was your age an knew about this virus and that condoms did not protect against it, I would wait longer to have sex, but hey that is me, I have 20/20 vision of hindsight because I am decades older than you are.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question@ OhGetReal
Thanks a ton for your advice.
But did you read my question? I feel like you read the first and last paragraphs and that was it.
I did know HPV existed and was doing more research into it, which I have now furthered. I didn't know that it wouldn't show up on STD tests, but now I know. And I know quite a bit more than I did about the vaccines too. Thank you for that.
I am thinking long and hard about it, my boyfriend and I are having so very in-depth conversations. And we're doing our research. The original question that I asked was part of that research.
We are talking about what happens if all our methods fail and I end up pregnant. We haven't decided on ANYTHING yet, with regards to sex or pregnancy. But for what its worth my boyfriend is a young, highly successful entrepreneur who would be able to support a pregnancy financially. And emotionally.
And like I said, I haven't decided anything yet, except that if we do this, I'm going to be as safe as possible. Whilst I acknowledge abstinence is the only 100% guarantee.
Do you have any answers to my original actual questions? I realise that I shouldn't NEED to use the spermicide or sponge but I want to know about it. Most people realise abstinence is the only guarantee, but advise that if one is going to go ahead, to get tested and to use more than one form of contraception.
Can you answer my questions about spermicide or the sponge?
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A
female
reader, OhGetReal +, writes (9 August 2010):
If you are on the pill and not taking antibiotics which lessen their effectiveness, then you should not need to use spermicide. Condoms will help protect you against STD's, but not all STD's, as the human papilova virus can still be contracted even with the use of condoms. It is one of the most common human viruses there are with over 100 strains of it, 43 of which are responsible for causing cancers of the anus, oral cancers and cerivical cancer.
The fact that you are so young puts you at an extreme risk of contracting the virus and condoms do not protect. You can also contract the virus through oral sex. It can live under your boyfriend's fingernails. You do not have to have multiple partners to get the virus or even have sex more than once, it is a virus that is highly contagious ESPECIALLY amongst young people. There is a vaccination for it and I would highly recommend that you get it, although the jury is out on how effective it is against cancer...
I would think long and hard about having sex at your young age, but of course, that is your decision. Have you figured out what you will do and how you will support an unwanted pregnancy at your age should it happen? Do you know how expensive babies are? Are you prepared to take on the adult responsibilities of raising a child while giving up on your childhood and on your dreams for a future?
Is sex really worth all that? Do you see the value in waiting until you are an adult and ready to start a family? Or do you really think sex is worth ruining your young life over?
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