A
male
age
36-40,
*ash
writes:My best friend is a girl. I have feelings for her for quite some time. Anyway, we came to a point where i can openly tell her that i love her. She also tells me the same thing. Thing is, we are more than just friends. We are very physically and emotionally close, and we do everything couples do except kissing. So, i told her that i like her - not just like a friend, but like a girl. I told her that i love her. Anyway, she told me that she loves me, but only as a friend, but, she knows that our relationship is much more than just a friendship, but that suits her perfectly. I really want to be with her, but, i don't really know what to do... I'm really afraid that i could lose her as a friend, and i think she is too... can you help?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2007): i see 2 options:
1. stick with her and wait it out
2. date others, and keep her as a close friend
i think either one of these can work out. she cant hold it against you if you date, so why not do it? if you want to wait it out and see if she will grow to love you, that is cool except you may look back and see you have wasted your time.
both have worked for me in college. for example: there was a girl that i was 'good friends' with, and we kept it on that level for a few years and nothing was ever said of a deeper meaning, until years later and we had a great summer fling. no love lost. she moved away and that was that. the other example is i was just like you, very upfront with my feelings and being in love with the best friend. we hooked up and it didnt last long, we were just better suited as friends.
my advice is: Dont go out hunting for women, but keep an eye out for other opportunities and take them if they seem interesting. she may get a bit jealous, and you know what that means. with luck.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2007): I've been in this sitation. My relationship started off as friends, I wanted to take it further she didn't. She had a one night stand with a really handsome guy then came to me wanting to take it further?
And because our friendship was close I did, then 6 years later after numerous attempts to gain her approval. Critism and attempts to mould me into the man she really wanted.I proposed And she turned me down.
Its a carrot and stick situation, if you were physically attractive she would jump you.
You will get hurt if you don't break it off
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A
female
reader, baybee-x-sparkii  +, writes (27 October 2007):
 take this slowly it seems clear that at the moment she only wants a friend...she needs time to build trust and maybe even love... take her out as friends, treat her well, take care of her in bad situations-all these things can make it easier for agirl to trust and fall in love with someone.
if you need anymore help email me
x
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A
female
reader, Gretal  +, writes (27 October 2007):
Well love cannot be a one way street, If the love she is feeling for you is friendly love and yours is passionate love,(better cool it dude,"Mellow Yellow" until she decides if she is willing to cross over that line and take it to another level. try not to be to pushy w/ her about it. When you say "physically & Emotionally closeness" are you refering to a "Established Sexual Relationship Together"? You sort of confused me there?
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A
female
reader, hello2580 +, writes (27 October 2007):
well tt happend to me exept of corse im a girl i think u should give her clues (secret message from a annamaonuss) she will be lookin if she likes u more just wont admit it then she will realize that u like her more then a friend just try it then if it dont work if ur such good friends then no harm should be done . now dont like give BIG clues light 1s so u no it wont ..............well wateva dunno how to explain jut take the advise
Savannah
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