A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: For a year (since yesterday) I had a very intense and significant on/off relationship with a guy. We broke up in October, were sex buddies for a month and then kept randomly meeting up and fooling around. We've been relatively close throughout the whole time even when we weren't in any kind of relationship, but it's been totally screwing with my head as to how he feels about me. I'm not in love with him and haven't been since probably about august/september, but he still means more to me than anyone in the world, even though he probably doesn't know it. He's with someone at the moment and has been for about 2 weeks, they were friends for a few years so I think this relationship might work. So I've realised that now is the best possible time for me to try to move on, and I kind of am. But some things he wrote in a blog on his webpage a few days ago really got to me. Our summer was amazing, the best time of my life and I know that he was very happy too, which is rare for him. But he wrote that it was 'boring'. I know it's petty, but this REALLY upset me as it was such a significant time, and that I was pretty much the centre of his world throughout the summer. He has ADHD and the chances are he didn't realise that it would effect me, but I really hate him right now for it, and I've never hated him before. Is this a good thing because it'll help me to get over him, or should I get over it because it's not really fair to take what he's saying so literally? He may have been trying to get back at me for causing tension between him and his girlfriend (I bumped into him the other day and it was clear she wasn't happy that there were obvious sparks still between us, he was pretty flirtatous towards me and insulted her), or he may have been trying to prove to her that I am insignificant to him.
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broke up, flirt, move on, spark Reply to this Question Share |
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male
reader, guylostinlove +, writes (17 December 2006):
If you want to move on ... the best thing might be for you to get all that hatred out. Write a letter to him and stuff it away or tear it up. Just get the thoughts in your head out. I find that to be very helpful to me when I want to forget about events or someone and just move on with my life. Then I don't look back. And, since you said you think his relationship with the new girl will be something that looks to work out .. in the process, you would probably be helping him by leaving him alone. Yes, I can say it sounds petty of your anger over him for what he said ... though, I would probably feel that way myself ... but, I guess the thing to do is not to be so petty and move on ... somehow ... just move on .. easy to say, hard to do.
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