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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi I was raped when I was 15 and now I am 18, but while I was 16 I started using men. I am not proud of that. I used to get them to fall in love with me then I would cheat on them. But now that I have a fiance and he's great, he understands what happend to me, I don't enjoy sex with him. I love him a lot but when we do have sex I stop half way through and shake all over. I don't know how long my fiance will put up with it. We have been engaged for 1 year and a half. Please help
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2005): First off congratulations with your engagement. you have already come so far as a victem of rape. You need to talk to a counselor about your past. There are emotions in your head that have not been dealt with and it is effecting your love making. You obviously want to enjoy sex with your partner but need to overcome the trauma of what has happened to you. You appear to be reliving the trauma when you make love. Could I suggest in the meantime that you control lovemaking by going on top and being a bit more in charge. Then you can get off the fairground ride when it scares you too much. Find a good conselor and hopefully things will get better.
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reader, pops +, writes (17 October 2005):
Are you sure that shaking all over isn't an orgasm? You need professional counseling, and obviously have not seen anyone. If you want to save this relationship, get your self to a competent counselor now.
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