A
female
age
36-40,
*yl E Bean
writes: I've been seeing my boyfriend for over a year, but only had 'title' for eight months. We are complete opposites, but in the beginning that was the best thing because we learned from one another's experiences. We both used to party once in a while, handled our responsibilities great, and were a perfect match when it comes to being intimate. However, we went through some crazy times and it got a bit out of control so we've moved across country to better ourselves, but now we don't seem to get along. We don't talk, we don't go out, we don't agree on anything. I feel like maybe he is bored with me or doesn't want to be together anymore. How do I approach this to him without starting an argument? How do I get back the spicy contrast we once had? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Jyl E Bean +, writes (28 February 2010):
Jyl E Bean is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell I appreciate the idea of finding a hobby or activity that we can both participate in. We talked about it shortly after your answer and realized a lot of the things we are into, are outdoor activities. Since we live in Kansas now, it's cold lol. We did however go to college basketball game this week that his aunt had tickets for. It was not really my thing, but so nice to get out of the house and spend some quality time together. I'm going to keep trying to bring up ideas that we can do. Thanks again CaringGuy.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (21 February 2010):
This is the problem with opposites. It's true that opposites attract, but not that they stay together. You need to have things in common with a partner other than sex. You've now found that you've since you've moved away and it's just the two of you that you have nothing in common. It simply can't last. One will want to go out, one won't. Both will feel rejected. One will want to do one thing, one will want to do another. Both will feel rejected. This is how it is with opposites. Once you take away what you've learn from each other, there isn't anything there at all between you. I think though, that you can make a fight of it since you have already moved. The best piece of advice I can give is that together you find a few hobbies that you can do. Together, you both need to agree on a few things you can do as a couple. Even if it's just going out for a walk. But clearly if nothing changes, he's not the one for you.
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