A
female
age
36-40,
*har88
writes:me and my ex have been split up for 6 months im still in love with him i cry myself to sleep. he still comes to c me and we still do stuff and he says he loves me and cares for me then ignores me. what do i do i feel im falling into depression. i want him back so much please help me
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female
reader, leanne.od +, writes (14 September 2007):
 having suffered with depression for 6 years, i can relate to you. my friend asked for my advice because she still holds a torch for her ex and i will tell you exactly what i told her. he is stringing you along, he keeps you on side and that way, whenever he feels lonely or bored, he calls you and like a doormat you go running, which he knows you'll do. it's hard but the longer this continues, the worse it will get. you need isolation from this man. throw yourself into going out with friends, enjoy yourself. it's impossible to forget about people we love but you have to try. delete his number and avoid contact. it won't be easy but you'll get over him, time is a great healer. don't cut yourself off from everyone, talk, to friends, family, see a doctor and most of all realise that the world won't stop and he's the one missing out. good luck.
A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (14 September 2007):
 You haven't made a clean break of it and seeing him repeatedly is giving you false hope. It's hard to heal when you are holding on to something that is no longer there. You need to NOT see him for at least 6 months. At least. Give yourself a chance to mourn and grieve, and then get on with it. You are young, you have your health and it sounds harsh, but, life does not stop because one person leaves you. We all experience heartache at some point in our lives. Life's happiest moments are a little bit sweeter because we have known pain too. I know that you are strong enough to get over him, and I ALSO know that you will love again. It will be so better loving someone who returns your feelings, instead of wishing for something that you can't have. Don't allow yourself to become isolated and depressed. Get in touch with ALL of your friends and family too. Keep really busy and count all your blessings. I hope that you are feeling happier soon, take good care of yourself.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2007): It is normal to think about the last person you were in a dating relationship with, and 6 months is a good bit of time at your age....this seeing him and doing stuff without being his girlfriend anymore is taking it's toll on you, you aren't ready to just be his friend without feeling something is wrong and missing between you two.
This is unfair to you. You need to put You first in this situation and stop allowing him to treat you this way...you deserve better, you deserve to have your freedom too, and you won't be able to if you continue to hang back in your own life and wait around on him to determine your next move. It's simple stop doing this, get a life of your own that does not include him...make some new friends, get a hobby, spend more time with family what ever it is that you need to do to get over him and day by day you will find your mood lifting....he is bringing you down, this is the common denomiator here....stop seeing him, OK?
Then if he comes back after you stop talking with him, then you can decide if you want him back in your happy life, and my guess is you will be wondering, what was I thinking? where he is concerned. Hang in there, baby!
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