A
female
age
41-50,
*rchid5
writes:I was dating someone for just under 3 months then he developed depression from witnessing a traumatic event. I also identified in the short time of dating he can be paranoid and i suspected trust issues undealt with. He had a girlfriend in past cheated.With his depression he said we could only be friends and that it was for the best. It really hurt me i have struggled to keep a balance with space I've not hounded him. But I didn't want anymore months of the same which is communicating by text/email. It tends to be me initiating. When we have spoken he has always said when we together he was happy. Now I've decided to give full space for me to heal and I think its good for both. I want him to see my actions of no pressure but he knows i care. In my heart I want him back when he is better. He was in counselling and know he does whatever the doctor tells him .he's on his own recovery. I'm patient but a little scared he may not want to come back and start the new relationship we bth wanted.It's very hard. I know he didn't want to hurt me and I know he is still attracted to me as I've picked this up when we have seen each other. I miss him so much. It's been nearly 3 weeks which is not like me he will see this but I feel he knows my number. I just want him to contact jst a hello..valentines day next mth i'm hoping he'll remember last yr we were soon to go on our first date. I jst need to know there are feelings from him and some effort in communcation.I just felt if things carried on with texting so often its not good for me mentally. I can't deal with it. But i do want him well and to build a relationship. Can you imagine if we cld get through this it would bring us closer and a strong relationship. Hard to find and establish relationships with these essential building blocks.
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female
reader, NORA B  +, writes (28 January 2013):
Ido understand how you feel and its very difficult to deal with your boyfriends depression. I would advise you to find out all you need to know about this depression and paranoid and how he deals with it.You doing your best have given him space to heal.But the question is .Is this shortterm or longterm depression if so would you be able to handle it. Maybe he knows BEST when he stated that that you could only be friends. Best Luck Nora B.
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