A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey all - this is a long one so please bear with me. About 6 months ago, a guy I knew started flirting with me and I told him I liked him and he replied that he thought I was fit but just wanted "laughter". There came a point where he wanted to do "physical" stuff but I didn't want too. He told me he didn't know me enough to have sex, which was fine by me. He also told me this "was nothing". I messaged him the next day saying I didn't want anything physical with him because I prefer a deeper connection with someone to do that stuff and he sent some dismissive text back which was so juvenile. Along the line of "what, deeper in your ass" (yes really). I cut him out of my life.6 months later and we have been chatting again for about 2 months. We cleared the air up and he apologised and said he went weird because he isn't used too someone being so direct. Anyway, we text each other quite a bit and recently he text me "I did like you, but I couldn't bring myself to say it. I just wasn't ready for a relationship but I am now" he also flirts with me and always comments on my appearance (saying my body is nice but by the same token sometimes saying negative things about what I wear or how it could be improved) - he spent the whole so sat night until about 2am texting me. I asked him if he could be more direct and he went weird. Adding random comments in about rubbish and then saying stuff like "I love you". I told him to leave me alone as I found that strange. He text me the next day asking if I was ok and that I'd been nasty and told him not to contact me. I asked him about the "I love you" message and he said he threw that in there to lighten things up. We got chatting again and ended the text convo with him saying that he loves talking to me and loads of kisses and some stupid love heart emoji. I text him last night basically saying, what is this. You know I like you. Are you flirting with me cause you like me or I'm your friend. He replied saying he couldn't understand how I got the wrong end of the stick and he does really like me just as mates. I said, you said you used to like me and he said "a lot has changed since then" and that he flirts with people he knows so well.I can't see what has changed since then. He broke up with his ex who he apparently now dates but spends time contacting me and even comments how she's annoying him etcI'm so confused. Has be been misleading or have I been really stupid?
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broke up, flirt, his ex, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (2 December 2017):
 He's not a keeper. Block and delete.
Personally, I don't think you should even have given him another chance after what he said the first time.
A
female
reader, cityvillaa  +, writes (30 November 2017):
Sounds to me that he is immature and is playing mind games. Drop him and keep him cut out! First off "I Love You" are serious three words that people just use loosely especially guys. They usually say it because they mean it or because they know for some girls it leads them to the panties faster.
I would honestly block him and keep it pushing and live a fabulously life. Possibly get a boyfriend or hangout with other guys he knows just so he gets the message.
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A
female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (30 November 2017):
 This guy is a waste of your time.
If I were you I would go back to having no contact with him because he is really immature and just plain NASTY!
Cut contact, immediately!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (30 November 2017):
 Urgh, OP
JUST stop wasting time on this immature toad. Seriously. He is playing games.
Someone who gets pissy when you tell them you want a deeper thing than semi-intimacy and no relationship - that is the kind of guy you STAY away from. He is not going to grow up and mature in 6 months (which it SHOWS he hasn't) he just tried the "I'll apologize and get into her pants with sweet words, works on other girls, right?!"
JUST block his number and delete it.
Don't waste your time on this one. He likes to build it up to a place where the girl thinks he is REALLY into her and then pull back. It's for the ego rub and attention AND if he can get some... for the no strings sex.
Set your sights higher than some guy who acts like this.
Not just that... HE HAS A GF! Tell him to text her and flirt with her.
Seriously, though... BLOCK him and move on. The guy is not BF material.
Could you imagine dating a guy who thinks flirting with ALL the girls he "knows well" and talking smack about you behind your back to another girl is OK?
He is a crappy guy.
Come on, OP
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (30 November 2017):
 The real question is why are you still trying to work it out?
If he was interested he would be asking you out on dates and moving things forwards, not chatting a load of crap and confusing you.
He sounds like a complete waste of time. I've been through the whole 'messing with girls heads' thing when I was younger and immature and that's exactly what he's doing. Take it from someone who's been there, if he was genuinely interested he would be doing everything possible to let you know. This guy is messing you about because he knows that he can and You're letting him.
Get rid, block him and find someone who doesn't act like a child.
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