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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi I am "x" and married last December. In fact I had a very unusual marriage. It was an arranged marriage and I got married in 4 days. Really did not know the man to whom I got married. He left for abroad in 5 days and I joined him after nearly 9 months. That's the time we started knowing each other. We have different thoughts, likings, nature etc. I am the more adjusting one of the two. After a few days, I realized that my husband started keeping quiet. I enquired why this change in behaviour but he did not reply. This went on for some time and I kept quiet. But later on I found a letter in which he had professed love to another girl. When questioned, he said that those feelings were only known to him and she was out of it. That girl is from his office. We had a heated argument and lots of rude remarks were fired by each other. He also told me that he does not love me, no feelings for me. The present situtation is such that he is least interested in me and just comes home as a paying guest, eats food, goes to sleep. We have absolute no communication. It's really difficult for me to carry on. I want my relationship to work. What can I do to bring him out of this silence? I have already apologised for my behaviour many times but that has no effect on him. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, missdee +, writes (23 September 2005):
Relationships are hard even when both people are wanting to make it work. You didn't say why you two were married. If it was something he felt he had to do maybe he resents having to marry you. Especially if he is in love with someone else. We all want to be with the one that we love.
You can't make someone love you. It will only happen if the person opens themself and allows this to happen. It sounds to me like you husband has closed himself up to the possible of loving you. Talk to him, see if there is a future together. If not, then maybe you two should go your seperate ways. Wish you the Best.
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