A
female
age
30-35,
*azedandC0nfused
writes:Does he only want to keep hooking up?I met this guy Matt*(fake name) at a party in late September, his friend told me he was interested in me and he found me on Facebook, he then gave me his number and we've been hanging out since but I feel like we don't actually talk and get to know each other enough. we don't text back and forth a lot or anything, but we do spend a good amount of time together with his friends. We look like a couple to other people because we always hold hands, were always kissing, he pays for everything, we engage in sexual activities and I almost lost my virginity to him but we had no condom and we both agreed not to do it without one. Last night he met my dad for the first time, he even dressed up and put effort into it and my bestfriend told me at a party he was asking her and his friend's parents for advice on what to do when he meets my parents because they're strict. I'm confused though, when people ask us if were going out we both kind of deny it. At a Halloween party a drunk kid asked me if I was his girlfriend while I was sitting on his lap, I didn't know what to say so I just acted dumb and was like "What?" while he kept going on about how Matt* needs a nice girl and I seem like a nice girl for him. Then last night at a friend's party we were sitting on a bed and a girl asked if we were going out, it was obvious I heard her but I didn't answer and kinda looked away and after a couple seconds I heard him say in an unsure tone, "uhmm" and then "nah". I don't care if he just wants to hook up, but I'd rather know now before I start to develop really strong feelings for him and I don't want to just ask him. I'm not sure if I want a relationship but I still wouldn't be able to take the rejection if he doesn't. Is he just a horny 19 year old or does he want to be officially together at some point?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (16 November 2009):
Regardless if you two admit it, it pretty much sounds like you two are in a relationship. So if you want to know for sure, you need to talk to him about it. He may be afraid that you don't feel the same way (just how you're afraid that he doesn't feel the same way) so he won't tell anyone that you two are in a relationship. So you can keep being together and not put a title on it even though you would like to, or you can know for sure and face the possibility of rejection. If you didn't want a relationship, then you wouldn't care and wouldn't be asking this question. Good luck.
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