A
female
age
36-40,
*lueflower
writes:u can`t feel the emotional connection with ur lover ,i know that it feels good but not that good to me i`d rather have sex i`m talking about a loving,tender relathionship not a one night stand u can`t look in their eyes and feel the connection nor hear their breatham i weird or too romantic ???
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one night stand, oral sex Reply to this Question
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female
reader, blueflower +, writes (20 January 2012):
blueflower is verified as being by the original poster of the questioniknow sex can be naughty ,i just wanted to say is that oral is very pleasurable sexually but not romantically as it does`nt add to the intimacy while sex can be romantic and intimate
when u want to feel waves of emotions and the passion building slowly ,u don`t go for oral
thx for the answers
A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (20 January 2012):
 A few more thoughts about oral sex, but my intent is not the change the mind of the poster, "blueflower," or anyone else for whom the activity is not their cup of tea. I agree with "olderthandirt," as I have agreed with him on a few other topics, that oral is "raw sex" in many ways, and that its goal is pleasure.
But there is nothing wrong with pleasure, as I have seen, when a man can lead a woman to her first-ever orgasm via cunnilingus. I have applied techniques for more than 40 years that succeeded in doing exactly that. Most women, according to studies which can be cited, never experience an orgasm through vaginal penetration alone. Many never experience one during their lifetime. When done well, and usually in combination with "romance" and traditional sex, it can be a wonderful thing. Sex is by nature kind of a naughty thing, though entirely natural human activity, and "naughty" is subject to preferences and interpretation.
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A
male
reader, bruce lee  +, writes (20 January 2012):
 Heh heh heh heh heh !! You're not weird. You're just too innocent. Heh heh heh heh heh!! How old are you?
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A
male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (19 January 2012):
 I once went down a girl for over an hour. Ill boast about it cause I never enjoyed it as much as I did with her cause I took my time... made it passionate and she thought it was romantic for a one time thing.
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A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (19 January 2012):
 In terms of intimacy, I can't imagine much better than driving a girl wild whilst going down, for me, it turns me on even more than receiving it.
Sure it's not the most romantic thing in the world, but it's part of the foreplay in a sexual relationship, if you don't like it, then fine.
I wouldn't say it makes you weird, no.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (19 January 2012):
 Well of course not. Oral sex isn't even supposed o pretend to be "romantic" by nature it's raw sex with only pleasure as a goal.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (19 January 2012):
You wrote, "am i weird or too romantic ???"
No, you're not either. Oral sex is indeed rather naughty, but very sensual. By that, I mean that it stimulates the sexual organs to the utmost, and provides terrific orgasms, while the giver is showing a willingness to please the partner with no boundaries. In my opinion, it is "romantic" to want to please your partner with such abandon, but it is ok if you choose otherwise. Personally, I know from experience that my tongue and lips can bring a woman to fantastic orgasms, often multiple, which I am happy to provide. It can be kind of down and dirty, but if a woman is clean, I love the taste and smell - and love when she squirms and trembles in orgasm. If that is not romantic. it is at least very loving.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2012): I mean you are right. Oral is not romantic. It is dirty. But there are many loving couples who are crazy for one another and totally in love who engage in all sorts of sex acts, oral included. It is fun to be dirty.
The truth is that no matter what you are doing in terms of sex, whether oral or just missionary, if you have sex with someone who doesn't love you, it is going to feel disconnected and like you are just doing the act.
If you have sex or oral or whatever floats your boat with someone who does love you, it's going to be entirely different, cause that person loves you and respects you.
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A
female
reader, PerhapsNot +, writes (19 January 2012):
 Sex is as romantic as oral to me, lol. "Romantic" sex is really over-blown in the media. Honestly, it's plain boring to me.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2012): Oral sex alone, is just as worthless as a quickie with a stranger.But, putting it all together, with a loving relationship, the other touches, etc, it is a great and incredible addition to the regimen of lovemaking.Many women cannot orgasm with intercourse, at all, with any partner, and need oral or manual stimulation to reach orgasm.It isn't "oral sex" that is important, it is the caring and dedicated act of lovemaking that brings your partner to climax. It just so happens that oral sex is one of the ways that many women reach climax effectively.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (19 January 2012):
 I very much look in my lovers eyes when giving or getting oral sex....
Knowing how much my partner desires oral and how great it makes him feel is enough for me...
if you don't like doing it don't do it
if you don't like getting it don't get it.
there really are no rules other than be respectful of yourself and your partner and doing things you don't want to do is not respectful
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (19 January 2012):
 Blue Flower,
It tickles my funny bone when young people ask if they are weird. Personally I think oral sex is way oversold. So you don't agree with the opinion of the week. If you followed every whim of society you would be wishy-washy. The most telling part of your post is where you said "I'd rather have sex". So you know what you like. I can guarantee you that evolution didn't wire you to prefer oral.
As far as romance, I have long said that good sex happens inside a committed long term relationship. Everything else is a cheep imitation.
FA
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A
male
reader, LovelessAct1 +, writes (19 January 2012):
I respectfully disagree. I think that oral sex can be a romantic thing as it really comes down to a huge level of trust. You're basically making yourself 100% vulnerable to this person and that's something that really tests how comfortable you are with that person.
Of course its a personal opinion, and if you really don't enjoy oral that much, it will surely affect how you see it romantically.
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