A
female
age
41-50,
*ant22us
writes:how can i find out if my husband is gay, he refuse to have sex,he has never being the type that likes sex all the time, but he gets mad everytime i ask him what is the problem and get violance when i bring the subjectand he doesnt have any male friends my children think he is gay and alot of people tell me he acts like one i dont see itplease help me Reply to this Question
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female
reader, lexilou  +, writes (3 July 2008):
 Some people dont like sex or have been brought up to believe it is wrong or dirty.
I had a friend who tried everything, laying on the bed in stockings and suspenders, greeting him naked at the door etc etc , you name she probably tried it. He wasnt interested, she's still not sure how they managed to have two kids together. She eventually left him as they were more like brother and sister and she could no longer live like that, she had needs.
So it doesnt mean he is gay. I have a gay couple as friends and most of their friends are male, with only or two female friends so you cant say not having male friends is a sign he is gay. My ex husband is a bit effeminate but hes not gay, just not a really masculine guy.
Dont look for things, talk to him and ask him what is going on it could even be he has erectile problems. Get him to open up by being non-confrontatiional about this problem x
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2008): There is not enough information to give you an opinion. Have you ever had sex in your relationship with him? Was he traumitized as a child? Is he accountable for his time, in other words could he be having his sexual needs met elsewhere...can you give us more information?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2008): why can you not just discuss this with him, this is someone you have spent time with and must know. it is ok to ask and it is good to listen, especially listen, to this man, we all carry burdens through life and if we have an environment where we can share how we truly feel, then we express what is the reality/the now of who we are and what we are.
you must also ask yourself why you think these thoughts and what is behind this for you
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A
female
reader, LISAXXXG +, writes (3 July 2008):
 sounds to me like your husband has a lot on his mind wether this being because he is gay or purely for the fact he is worrying about something is there any way you can check his phone/phone bill or email account or even check the history on the computer im not sure what you mean by the way people say he acts gay in what way?? beacuse there is violence when you bring things up is there another trusted person you can turn to,to ask the questions for you kind of like mediation all three sit in a room you ask questions and he answers its a controlled enviroment and safe with some one else there it may be something completely different and i think he needs to get alot off his chest good luck keep us posted xx
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