A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:A few months ago my bf and I argued over him wanting to travel to Australia to visit a female friend. I felt extremely uncomfortable because1) he refused to tell me what they would be doing there2) I have never met this girl before3) he was willing to spend so much just to fly over to meet this friend of his (which made me ponder the importance of her presence in his life that he was willing to spend so much, especially when he doesn't have much savings or works) My stand is clear: its one thing to meet up with a female friend one on one locally. But its different when you are flying across the world just to meet a friend whom I have never met before. I told him I didn't feel comfortable with him going over to meet his friend and he didn't. Now, he wants to go on an exchange program to Australia. Given his personality, he is bound to look her up there. I still feel uncomfortable but I don't know how to broach it to him. Are my doubts even unfounded? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (9 October 2014):
 Q: "Are my doubts even unfounded? "
A: Nope. He's playing you and you'll be wise to dump his sorry bottom....
Good luck...
A
female
reader, Caring Aunty A  +, writes (9 October 2014):
 He’s full of BS and deceiving you at the same time by not being open and honest… If he “refuses” to tell you what they or he’ll be doing etc then there’s reason to be suspicious – uncomfortable.
Given your age, it begs the question, how long have you and he been a couple? It sounds like early days. If so, then let him fly across the world and be done with him. You like so many other young women want someone with commitment. He sounds like he has his own agenda and plans in life that don’t include you :(
By the way, is he yet to, or has he purchased a one way or a return ticket?
CAA
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (9 October 2014):
 As usual, Honeypie has figured your bf out.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (9 October 2014):
 He has checked out of the relationship and is pursuing what HE wants. He wants to spread his wings. And most of all he wants to spread them over the Southern hemisphere...
Has HE met her before? Or did he met her online somehow? Now if they know each other from (let's say) childhood I don't see the big deal in visiting. Though if he doesn't have a job and no saving how would he even afford to go?
Is he living with you? or his parents?
If he met her online, I would doubt he is wanting to visit a "friend" - I would presume there is a LOT more to this then a "pen-pal".
But for YOU to have to met her before he can visit a friend (if that is who she is -scenario #1 a girl he ha has known growing up moved to Australia years ago and they got back in touch and he wants to visit her and Australia) is quite controlling of you and it shows how little you trust him.
I am not sure why you are clinging ON to this guy, he is halfways around the globe in his mind constantly looking for ways to GET there.... You think it's so he can MET HER - so where does that leave you?
I'd wish him well and end it. He is only with you till he can find greener grass or.. a bigger continent it seems.
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