A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I broke up with a man a little over two years ago. We dated for six months,but didn't consummate the relationship due to some health issues he had. We ended up friend despite him playing games like trying to make me jealous only six weeks after our breakup and him sending mixed signals. I have lunch every so often with him and he usually asks me for a hug. I was in the trap of after our lunches thinking it was so much fun that we should get back together. I tried dating other men and still haven't found anyone I hit it off with or liked as much as I did him. I would then go on to suggest lunch again a week or so later and mention getting back together. He always tells me the same thing that I'm really sweet but, not the one for him. This is while hugs me several times. I finally broke the cycle and had lunch with him only once and had a good time, but know that I am over him. He is a nice man, but has a lot of growing and working on himself to do. I just have one question. The last time we had lunch he asked and gave me two hugs and then at the restaurant he sat next to me instead of sitting across from me. I have not tried to look into how he acts towards me as a sign that he likes me, but what does this mean? Is it just him getting an ego boost? Doing this unconsciously? Or does he still like me? I just would like to know because I'm sort of sick of this game and don't want to play it in any future relationships. I have met a man online and am going to meet him this week. I'm really excited and ready to move on. I know a lot of men mention that they don't like game players. So why is it that they play all these games. Are their egos that fragile?
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (6 December 2010):
 As far as your ex and his motivations, only HE knows why he does the thing he does. If I'm guessing he's hugging and sitting next to you, to show you that he isn't affected by your close proximity, but that he enjoys your company.
But in all honesty, stop spending time trying to analyze an ex to death. In the end it really doesn't matter WHY he does anything anymore, you two aren't together and YOU are ready to move on.
Games are for kids, but surprisingly enough plenty of grown ups play them too, sometimes without even knowing.
A
female
reader, xanthic +, writes (6 December 2010):
 You'll never be able to move on if your ex is still in your life on such a consistent basis. His actions are confusing because you have a history with him, and there's a certain attachment that comes with that. Neither of you have had a chance to transition from boyfriend/girlfriend to friends because there was no break in between. Distance yourself from him, it's really for the best.
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