A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am so in love with someone I shouldn't be in love with. It's been 12 months of trying to forget him, being permanently drunk and just acting psychotically.He wants to be with me but is married to a wife who says that she loves him and still wants him.I deserve nothing and realise that but he says that he's desperate to be with me and I know that I so want to be with him.So here's the question - do I make him leave his wife to be with me (they're currently separated because of us) or could it be possible that he could be happy in the long term staying with her. I really do just want him to be happy because I love him so much but can't be sure if he'll be happy with me or he would be happier staying where he is (he has children)I do love him and know 100% what I want.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2009): He has left his wife and shown his position. I haven't shown mine because his wife thinks he'll be happier staying with her and maybe she's right.
He's left his wife and has been living independently for 6 months. He doesn't know that I want him as I've told him I want to stay with my partner. I do love him but question if i really can make him happy or if his kids are enough.
Is it sufficient to have children or should you be happy in the adult relationship???
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2009): I can tell you from personal experience that you are in a self destructive relationship. This man is emotionally unavailable. If he were going to leave his wife he would have already done so. He may truly want to be with you but in the end his family (wife and children) will come first.
Take your chances, but tread softly. You are in very dangerous territory. A wife/ mother will do whatever it takes to ensure the happiness and stability of her family.
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