A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Are all women capable of having orgasms through intercourse? I think they say only a small percentage of women can orgasm just from intercourse. I'm 33 and it only happened once for me. I would love to figure out how to have more. I can climax from oral sex and masturbation no problem. Does anyone have any advice on how to get there? I read about CAT but frankly i don't really understand how its different from missionary.When i had my orgasm several years ago, i was lying on side of the bed and he was standing. Not sure if that means anything about what positions work best. Anyone know a good technique?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (1 June 2012):
 No NOT all women are capable of having orgasms through intercourse. I think it’s around or under 30%. AND if they are counting women like me who have had it ONCE as a fluke then the numbers are even lower…
I would personally NOT waste my time trying to figure out how to do something that’s so rare, rather I’d figure out with my partner what you both like and have that work for you.
For me sex is about being close to my partner and pleasing my partner… and I take care of my own orgasms thank you very much.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2012): There are literally hundreds of different sex positions, so just experiment with different ones til you find one that works for you. Women are much more likely to orgasm from girl-on-top positions as you're in control of the speed/depth of penetration etc. Also if you always have sex in the same position it can get a bit predictable so you're less likely to orgasm anyway. Hope this helps :)
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (1 June 2012):
 Honestly, Learn how to get one by YOURSELF. Then show your partner. Insertion doesn't = orgasm.
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A
female
reader, iloveblue  +, writes (1 June 2012):
 In my case, I used to be hard up on having that big O and I always end up disappointed after sex. Coz I know I am getting there, but my bf (now my ex) bf could not wait for me any longer. My current bf has made me appreciate sex more and I have orgasm most of the time. I don't know if the reason could be that I am more experienced. But as the other posters mention here, I believe there are 2 important factors. It is you and your partner.Your partner has to be patient with you. Men are quick to climax whereas women need more time to get there. Your partner should be patient with you, what I do is I try to distract him or even sometimes make him stop or pause or slow down. Also try watching adult movies together just to put you in the mood. Or make the place romantic like put candles or do it in places that will make both of you thrilled or excited. For myself, the most helpful tool is to be relaxed and enjoy the sex. I promise you, if you keep on worrying that he might notice that you are not sexy enough, not experienced enough in bed, not flexible for a position. Just let yourself enjoy every second of the lovemaking. Kiss your partner, hug your partner, moan if you like just let yourself go. Let yourself enjoy him and him enjoy you.So have you asked yourself why you can do it when alone? It's because when alone, you are not selfconscious and no restrictions. Bring that personality to your partner and both of you will benefit.
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A
male
reader, Hugh.J  +, writes (1 June 2012):
 If your partner isn't so immature as to be fazed by it, try using a bullet vibrator on your clit whilst he is performing; you get the feeling of intimacy because he is in you and you stimulate yourself to orgasm with the vibrator. He gets to enjoy your enhanced reactions, too!
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (1 June 2012):
 It is true that most women rarely experience orgasm solely from vaginal penetration by a penis. Most say that it feels good, but usually no climax. It's almost like a design flaw. The clitoris, which is the focal point of sexual pleasure for a woman, is located somewhat north of the vagina. Therefore, it is usually not stimulated only by penal thrusts into the vagina.
However, the clitoris is only the focal point of a woman's sexual organ, which includes other areas such as the so-called G-spot inside the vagina. I call the extensive sensitivity of all a woman's sexuality the "clitoral complex." I've written a lot about the clitoral complex on this Web site, which can be found using the search feature. Find more there if you wish. I'm not going to rewrite it.
But in my experience, pleasing a woman is simple by realizing that she needs good foreplay, maybe some romance, hugging and kissing, fondling, patience and perhaps more. She needs to be warmed-up. Then, cunnilingus (licking clitoris) can usually provide an orgasm or two, and she might even climax with following intercourse. That's my formula learned over some 45 years. Check the archives here for DoubleM on clitoral complex, cunnilingus, female orgasm and much more.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2012): It's a grey area. Definitely true that only a small percentage of women orgasm reliably and regularly through sex, but that doesn't mean those who don't aren't capable of it.
You've already experienced an orgasm, so clearly, you 'can'. Try it in missionary and get your guy to push upwards, aiming to rub the roof of your vagina an inch or two from the front, as that's where the G spot is located. In this position it's also possible for him to 'grind' his pelvis against the external part of the clitoris.
There are loads of helpful sites on the internet about this, check them out!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2012): I'm a woman whose only gets orgasm from intercourse or penetration...I've never had an orgasm from oral and very rarely from manual masturbation. I would really like to though and wondered what it would like to be that sensitive. Grass is always greener I guess.
My advice would be to try riding him and find an angle that works for you. It depends a lot on your anatomy and the location of you G spot. Try leaning forward and backward while you ride and see if you find your magic spot.
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A
female
reader, shrodingerscat +, writes (1 June 2012):
 No, not all women are capable of reaching orgasm without clitoral stimulation. Actually, MOST women need direct clitoral stimulation, so you're 100% perfectly normal and honestly shouldn't stress yourself worrying about how you can magically make yourself into a completely different person.
You can orgasm. You're ahead of the game in regards to some women. Some women die without ever having ONE orgasm, so the fact that you can orgasm readily with oral sex and masturbation makes you normal and healthy.
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