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anonymous
writes: Has anyone ever been hit by their partner, taken them back and found they really have changed? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, x.BrokenxHearts.x +, writes (26 November 2006):
Hi, i'm only 16 but ages ago I was at my sisters and her fiance just hit her when they were rowing she left him straight away and hasn't been in contact with him since this was 5 years ago and 6 years ago my parents split up and my mum re-married the person she married hits my mom. He's put her in hospital many times. Broken her wrist, her ribs and given her a black eye and she kept going back to him she's still with him now. Even now i'm still full of hatred because he changed for a while but then he went back to his old ways. If any of my partners ever hit me I'd leave them and wouldn't look back no matter how much I loved them. It's just not acceptable and if they really loved you they wouldn't dream of harming you in anyway physically and emotionally. I know this probably means nothing to you but honestly sometimes forgiving people isn't the best thing to do.
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A
female
reader, jaynehaigh +, writes (26 November 2006):
I was in an abusive relationship years ago and repeatedly left him and went back with the constant promises of change. It never happened. This was not particularly bad abuse just pushing and shoving but i was scared and didnt like it and was not willing to put up with it. Only you know what has happened in your relationship and only you know what your willing to accept and what your not. If it was not particularly bad (like he beat you up) I would be tempted to sit down with him and explain your concerns and ask him what he wants to happen. I'm sure he feels really guilty (they generally do - even the worst). If he appears genuine and you sincerely love him and believe that the relationship could work I would be tempted to give it one more go. I would like to stress the ONE! Please do not fall into the trap again. People can make genuine mistakes and things get out of hand - but if they do not learn from them after been given another chance they never will. I wish you all the best and always remember whatever happened between you it is NOT your fault no matter what.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2006): This is such an incredibly complicated question. If your partner has hit you (and this needs to be stressed further if he/she has hit you repeatedly) chances are they won't change. Of course, there are always those freak instances when he/she comes home from the pub drunk, grouchy, and gives you a quick slap or shove aside, but only you know the circumstances here. The very fact that you're asking this question indicates that it's serious, and you should only reconsider if your partner has received counseling and recognizes their problem.
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