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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Can anyone suggest ways of increasing my labido? Im 21 and have been with my boyfriend for 2 years, he's great, affectinate and passionate but I havent had sex with him for 6 months. I feel clostraphobic when he gets close to me. I love spending time with him but I just dont feel any sexual excitement towards him or anyone else.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2008): I am 23 and have the same problem. I have been racking my brain for solutions...everything from horny goat weed to switching birth controls to switching boyfriends. It is a huge strain on the relationship. I have tried switching b.control and it helped somewhat, though I think the biggest issue is the fact that I constantly feel pressure to have sex from my boyfriend. He alwayse pouts and makes me feel guilty when I say I'm too tired (which is often the case). It gets to the point where I am afraid of kissing him because I immediately feel that it will lead to him wanting sex and the resulting guilty feeling . My advice would be to speak to a sex therapist and try to get your boyfriend to go with you (mine won't).I think an open communication with your boy would greatly help too. If you are like me, you want to feel respected before you have sex with your man and that means he needs to respect your boundaries. Of course a tried and tested technique is to put yourselves in each others shoes for 5 minutes everytime one of you has a complaint and really imagine it can work too...it may help shed some light and perspective into the issue.Hope this helps,
A
female
reader, CarrieMagdelene  +, writes (16 January 2007):
 It's good that your relationship is not based on just sex. Hey, lady! This is a good question, and in one of my herbal remedy books, it said Tongkat Ali, Maca, and (seriously) Horny Goat Weed. Yea, that last one sound funny, right? Look these up further on the internet, and you'll probably come in contact with these at organic herb stores. :)
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A
female
reader, AngelofLove  +, writes (1 January 2007):
 See the GP for further advice.
You are quite young and are missing out. You do not say if you always had low libido, even though the advice is the same.
Try a change in diet, eat foods rich in Zinc and iron. Exercise might also help. Do not rule out hipnotherapy, there may be underlining issues there, and most importantly relax before making love.
Good luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2006): The first thing to check out is your hormone levels, have some bloodwork done at your gyno's office and tell the doctor your complaint...also if you are on birth control that can sometimes have that effect for some women, you just need to try another pill or form of birth control that will not lower your libido to zero! Also, do you feel depressed? If you do, medication will make a world of difference, but you need to discuss all of these things with you doctor. Good luck to you.
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