A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi,Me and my boyfriend are in a long distance relationship t the moment and hope to move in together soon. But its been very difficult. He hates emailing, calling and texting in general as it is but does make the effort to stay in contact often.But whenever we talk over the phone we always seem to argue or he says im being annoying all the time? I ask how he is and what hes up to etc because i miss him and want to know how he's doing. But he seems to hate that? It even got to the point last night where he said he wasnt sure moving in was a good idea?He later said that he still wants to though because he loves me. But i dont understand why when we are together we get on great but when we're apart he can be loving and then angry with me?Its hard enough not being with him so any ideas why calling has become difficult too?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (18 April 2013):
 He just does not like phones or computers I guess.
My hubby and I were LDR the first year of our relationship... only 2 hours apart by car so we saw each other every weekend once we got serious.
I always needed and wanted more contact than he did.
He hates texting and he still is a lousy texter... we tend to email a LOT.... and I was the caller most of the time...
eventually we worked out a routine:
He requested that I call him at 8 am every morning to wake him. This phone call usually lasted under a minute.
days that we had crisis being handled (moving arrangements, family issues, etc) we talked and emailed more
but most days... we had no other contact till I got home and got into bed to go to sleep.. I would then call him for my bedtime tuck in... some nights the call lasted 2 minutes...
it was his compromise.... he could have gone weeks without talking to me....
being apart from the one you love is hard... some of us cope better than others.
how long have you been LDR? have you ever NOT been LDR?
how often do you see each other?
and when you say you HOPE to be moving in togther soon...why HOPE... what's the plan?
A
female
reader, dearkelja +, writes (18 April 2013):
 Some people just aren't phone people. Could be that when you ask questions he feels like you are quizzing or checking up on him. Maybe try to keep the phone conversation to "how was your day, mine was great, love you, have a good night,"
When he's with you he's focused on you. When he's away he is likely focused on other things. Moving in is a big commitment, especially to go from a LDR to moving in. Is there anyway he can live with someone else, or you can? You might want to try living in the same town before living in the same house.
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