A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Does anybody have any ideas for spicing up sex during pregnancy? My fiance and I still have a very active sex life but im 37 weeks along and most positions are getting very difficult or impossible. Also, I don't feel sexy or romantic so does anybody have any ideas on that as well?
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male
reader, daletom +, writes (31 August 2008):
(A male guy person of the masculine sex responds. I have been through four pregnancies with my wife.)
There are several questions here. First off, do NOT assume you are unattractive! At the very least, anybody who thinks that "pregnant" is the same as "fat" hasn't looked very closely. Personally, I consider most pregnant women beautiful and sexually desirable. I know I am not alone in that belief, but I also know that some guys feel just the opposite. (And a few guys are afraid that sex with a pregnant woman will harm the baby, or that it somehow "violates" her.) How does your guy feel about this? Your primary concern should not be making yourself look sexy to every guy, but instead work at being attractive to him.
Pregnancy - especially our first - was a very special and loving time together. I never felt a need to "make it romantic" - being with the woman who carried my child was inherently loving and romantic by itself. It was awesome to put my ear down against her tummy and hear the baby's heartbeat. (It doesn't take special instruments to do that, especially in the last month or two.) We didn't do a lot of the massage or body-rub stuff together, but we usually bathed together and paying special attention to her body helped her feel better about herself. And - we could make jokes and laugh about it between ourselves. (Although I understand her NEXT husband will NOT make a magic-marker "smiley face" on her belly, on the day she sees the OB/GYN doctor.)
In the later stages, sex is necessarily less vigorous and more gentle. There was more time given to foreplay, fondling, oral sex, and less to penetrative intercourse. She has always liked being on top, and continued to use variations of that position up to the last few days. We finished in the spoons position. (She would often hold my wrists during my orgasm so I didn't clasp her too tightly.)
We had done quite a bit of non-penetrative lovemaking before we had intercourse, and we became re-acquainted with those skills whenever she was simply not up to full intercourse. Even so, we had intercourse within a day of going into labor on each of the pregnancies.
Please know that you have my thoughts and prayers for a safe delivery and healthy baby.
A
female
reader, SugarCookie +, writes (30 August 2008):
I looked on google and got a website that says why it is good to have sex while pregnant and it says that you should try either woman on top, doggy, or spooning. I would also try laying on your side with the top leg bent and up toward your stomach. You can just lay there while your husband goes in from the side. I'm not pregnant and I like that position.
As far as feeling sexy its normal to not feel that way right now but only you can do what you normally do to feel sexy. Your husband must still find you drop dead sexy if at 37 weeks he still wants you like mad. If you normally do your hair or make up when your not pregnant then do that. Every girl feels sexy in different ways so do what you know works.
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