A
female
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anonymous
writes:I am pretty sure that this is not such an uncommon problem and hopefully the answers to this question might help others. I was in a relationship for thirteen years and then one day my live in boyfriend just packed his things and went back to his hometown. That was two and a half years ago and since then I feel like I have been living a half life. It is kinda lonely but safe as I have built up such a wall around my heart that I have forgotten what it would be like to have someone in my life..in fact I guess I have decided that it is not meant to happen and as each day goes by the wall gets bigger and bigger. The lonliness and pain seems preferable to the pain of getting my heart broken again. I have good friends and have many interests, am involved in volunteer organizations but almost feel that the fun flirty girl I once was is dead and gone. I do not like living this way but it is habitual now....and safe. Any tips on how I might start looking at getting back into life again from the great agony aunts here.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSenstitive and inspired advice by Dapone 1....just very articulate and inspiring...excellent and thank you
A
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reader, dapone 1  +, writes (7 February 2008):
 No way has that fun girl vanished off the face of the earth, look in a mirror,she still there, it seems that you have put all your energy into other projects, and forgotten to give yourself time to adjust, you have just given up on yourself and that is a real waste, there is some one out there in the same position as yourself, just looking and hoping that he may bump into you , but your not there, your building brick walls, instead of going out and enjoying yourself.
Do not waste your life, because one person has hurt you, go out and enjoy your life, meet new people, have a laugh and who knows the person you have always wanted to meet may just be there for you, do not throw your life away because of one idiot, there are plenty of good guys out there honest.
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