| A
male
,
*omeguy
writes: Hi i am 18 and i have never really had a girlfriend and i have been unfortunate enough to be born with the worst astetically pleasing hair colour. ( thats my excuse). i dont think i am that unattractive (apart from the above) but it seem that i simply cannot get a partner. does anyone have any advise.Thanx-sumguy-
View related questions:
ginger, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2011): I have a boyfriend who has ginger hair and to be quite honest i think ginger hair is gorgeous on boys. It makes the different from any other boy, and i think its pretty fine. i think that you shouldn't really let it knock your confidence when it comes to girls. So what if your ginger! your perfect just the way you are:)xxx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2011): personally i think ur lucky yh u may get bullied a little bit but you've been blessed with georgus hair, my bf is ginger and idmit it was what attracted me to him at first.theres a lot of girls who think gingers a turn on so dnt feel disheartened by th fussy ones who dont appreciate u x
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2010): Hey mate. In exactly the same position as you except im a year older. Been ginger all my life, hasn't bothered me too much in general but when it comes to interacting with women it does knock my confidence a bit. But its really my lack of confidence in general thats holding me back. It seems stupid, im at university with tonnes of girls around me yet i dont seem to have the confidence to go up to any and its worrying me. The thing is though when i talk to girls online they say i come across as confident, funny and a bit arrogant which is the complete opposite of what i am in real life. I just can't seem to generate that confidence in real life :/.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2010): mate, im ginger, not ugly, but aint a great looker. seems that a guy who isnt up his own arse (like most of us gingers) really appeals to a lot of women. ive been with my girl for 2 years now, we are both utterly in love and she is beautiful with an amazing body and personality. being honest and caring really prevails and how im reeking the benefits :) dont worry, be friendly, kind and youll find someone eventually :)
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2010): Honestly, I never ever thought I would be attracted to a redhead guy! (i've always been the one to date the hot guy/jock stereotype and was never happy with the way they treated me.) but I just met the nicest, confident and genuine guy :) and we just talk for hours about everything! His personality won out, and now I am dating a ginger. :) haha and I am SO attracted to him, (not even because of his looks, which i now think are so adorable :) I'm finding that when you start liking someone, flaws become the thing you love most about the way your guy looks! They just make him look so much more adorable and unique and yours.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2010): im not one who is attracted to a specific hair colour, and my man's a ginger and holy smokes he is so awesome, sweet, understanding and downright gorgeous. you've got absolutely nothing to worry about. you'll find someone worthwhile and you'll be so happy when you do :3
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2010): I quite fancy the look myself, wouldnt think twice if a guy with ginger hair asked me out, im an attractive girl and guys who completely fancy themselves put me right off.
Someone who isnt shallow is what i'm looking for in a partner, and more importanlty someone I click with.
I think focus on your personality rather than things that don't matter, update us with your new relationship status soon if you can ;o)
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2010): trust me you have nothing to worry about. I'm one of those girls that loves gingers and is attracted to any ginger out there these people do exsist all you have to do is find the one that likes you for you. So don't give up trust me I know I'm not the only girl like this so just keep on looking.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2010): Hey
Im a 16 year old ginger guy. Ive always lacked confidence as I believed that I could never get a girl due to my hair colour. Recently though I realised that there are some girls out there (not only ginger ones) who adore the gingerness. I managed to hook up with a beautiful latino in my school, it happend by accident as one of my mates said I fancied her. She then came over to me and said if that was true. I replied yes of course. and it all kicked off from there.
The key is confidence my friend. Its hard to obtain but once you have it youll be crawling in the clunge.
...............................
A
female
reader, mollycatherine  +, writes (12 April 2010):
i am primarily, and mostly attracted to only gingers!!!! We do exist!!!!! Just wanted to give you some hope....
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2010): I know how you feel at the moment im dealing with some shall we say issues all to do with my hair color one is the same as yours i'm worried about my it being a disadvantage, the other i don't think i should say it may worry some people!
i am only 15 girls have told me i am nice looking but i do not think so i don't know something about me that is think is unattractive but people seem to think otherwise!
i think all of us young redheads will get threw this together i know lounger give a **** about what bullies think its just i worry about how girls react to this!
hang in there my friend!
...............................
A
male
reader, harry_scrinson  +, writes (31 March 2010):
ginger is great. It shouldnt hold you back.
I dont think im that attractive but we have an office do an anonymous survey (childish I know but there was a reason though I cant remember what) all the girls picked the guy they most wanted to date and vice versa.
40 girls in that office and of the 40 blokes i managed 2nd. I was shocked because I kind of thought people would go for the more conventionally ood looking blokes (3 of htem were models) and there were a good half dozen sporty good looking guys.
If you are nice, confident and treat women with respect (there is a difference to eing a doormat and being repectful) 8/10 women will see you for who you are.
Just dont get hung up on a problem u think is there but most girls dont even think about
...............................
A
female
reader, MajesticToys +, writes (7 March 2010):
Ohhhhhh my gosh I LOVE gingers... I would totally date one in a heartbeat. Honestly, there are few things that turn me on as ginger guys do. I don't know what it is about the red hair, but something about it makes me crazy :P You just gotta find the right girl; I'm clearly not the only one that's into it! :)
...............................
A
female
reader, emzbaybee +, writes (19 February 2010):
 HI, i am a 16 year old female ginger with freckles and i'm really pale, i look like i'm a ghost, haahaha. Anyway i haven't actually been picked on, i'm quite lucky :) I've been asked out by a few guys and being ginger doesn't seem to be an issue, they said that it actually turns them on a bit as they find it incredibly SEXY ! anyway i'm going out with another ginger guy and i find ginger boys EXTREMELY HOT and SEXY !!! 3 you shouldn't be ashamed, and DO NOT DYE IT !!! just keep it the way it is, girls should like you for who you are, it doesn't matter what hair colour you've got and like i said i find gingers REALLY HOT !!! xx
...............................
A
male
reader, imginger +, writes (5 November 2009):
well im ginger and ive had a few girls on me, mainly because im funny but still... . thanks all those who have said about red hair being awesome btw :) it makes me feel alot better about myself :)
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2009): I have noticed this too. It seems odd that red hair is always at a disadvantage. Me, personaly I hope who ever I end up with is red headed, it is just so wonderful and unique. I really wish I was a red head, im a dark blonde. I think it may not be so much the hair color but red hair comes with fair skin-- MOST of the time, i do have a Red headed cousin and she has TAN skin she is only 4 but she is GORGEOUS. But for what ever reason tan is a big thing. I don't like being near tan people because I don't EVER tan I BURN and i look like a ghost next to them. Pleease dont die it! The girls who would pay more atention to you because you have a different color are probaby shallow.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2009): What I don't understand is the double standard that exists when protraying Men and Women with red hair.
It seems to me that if a women has red hair then she can be seen as sexy and alluring. Yet the same cannot be said for the redheaded man. Why?
...............................
A
female
reader, ccjj06 +, writes (27 March 2009):
 i think its SEXY!! I wish i could find one... lol. I mean hair color doesnt really matter, but if its the first impression and it was me... mmm hmm ;p
...............................
A
female
reader, Frankie14 +, writes (16 January 2009):
 oooh gingers are too hot, im sure theres a lot of other people who feel the same
maybe you just arent looking hard enough
eek i love gingers yum
...............................
A
female
reader, GirlLeastLikelyTo +, writes (10 January 2009):
To the 34 year old who posted in May 2008 - if you're still single, drop me a line!! I love gingers and I especially love the freckliness.Honestly, to all you auburn-haired beauties out there, a lot of people actually find ginger hair attractive but may be reluctant to admit it and will bow to peer pressure and go ginger baiting but deep down, they probably fancy you rotten.A sense of humour regarding your lovely colouring is an effective tool in potentially wooing the opposite sex.Good luck guys and remember, there ARE definitely pleanty of women who find ginger hair attractive (not just me!).
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2008): So you basically had to disguise your true hair colour for a women to actually take a interest in you. That says a lot about women. I'm glad it worked for you, but what you are basically saying is that you should basically deceive women so they won't be put off by your ginger hair. God that is depressing.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2008): Hi mate - listen up and listen good.
I had the same problem - ginger - teased (even today get the odd comment from some moron) but like a lot of these answers CONFIDENCE is a huge part of the solution. I had the odd girlfriend when growing up and one was a stunner - ended up dumping me cause her buddies made fun about me being ginger (thats teenagers for you). I struggled up till about the age of 21. Dyed my hair dark brown (not too brown) got some nice clothes and just went out with my buddies - what a difference - the attention I got was great! Pulling was never easy but having dyed my hair it gave me the confidence to talk to girls and when you do that the rest follows.
Now I have a girlfriend (7 years in) and still get the odd offer. I have since found out that there were plenty of girls in my year who actually fancied me with red hair but nothing came of it - perhaps if I had been more confident years ago - talked to them - actually believed girls may be attracted to me I could have hooked up with them.
For me taking control of the situation by dying my hair worked for me - give it a try see what happens - it's not about hiding that your ginger - they will find out soon enough - its about adapting to the situation - giving you more confidence and giving the ladies a chance to not overlook you as if they give you some time they'll find out your a great guy. Personality is key, talking to ladies is essential, I found dying my hair allowed them to see me not the ginger. My girlfriend didn't think I was ginger when I first met her but she got to know me and is not bothered at all by the ginger. I don't dye my hair anymore but I will admit it gave me the boost I needed - adapt and you will see!
...............................
A
female
reader, Susan Strict +, writes (23 May 2008):
 Ginger is great. Ginger is wonderful. Personally I prefer to call it "pure gold"!
I'm ginger and so is my partner, although as he pointed out when I answered another ginger question on here, some of it is a little grey in places these days. And that's another plus, because the grey doesn't show half as much as it would with almost any other colour hair.
As for not being able to go out in the sun much, that's complete rubbish. There's perfectly good sunblock lotion available, however sensitive your skin. I use factor 35 because otherwise yes, I burn badly.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2008): i a 34 year old man, who has never had a relationship or a proper girlfriend, I have ginger hair and a lot of freckles. What is frustrating is that my parents and sister do not, nor does anyone else in my family. I do feel suicidal alot of the time because i am rejected by women because of the way i look.
I Feel jealous of people who can have normal relationships.
I cannot go out in the sun much and i do not tan.
What can i do?...there is no cure of medical procedure i am aware of that can fix this. I wish there was
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2008): hi im male and 20 also have been ginger all my life. I have never had a problem with women at all its all about confidence if you are unconfidant a woman wil pick up on it. Also i just tend not to mind what people think if they have issues with my hair they r their issues not mine!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2008): Some girls (like me) LOVE IT!!!! serously....ginger guys are FIT!!!!!!! x
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2008): I'm Ginger and I'm very popular.. But when people joke about my hair I take the piss out've their hair colour too and they like it.. Try 'Fudgehead' that usually works.. ;) Cheer up fella...
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2007): I am a ginger guy ( 15 ) I do fine with girls here in Bristol ( England ), the girls I have been with tell me things like 'you are so sweet' ( whatever that means ) but I have noticed that my personality seems to bring the girls in, rather than my looks and I get quite a few girls who are interrested in me. Also don't feel it is a set-back or something to be in anyway ashamed of, I have never suffered any form of bullying ( teasing, yes admittidly but mostly as you would expect friendly teasing ) and I know various other ginger people ( no, we are not dying out ) and in particuarly one of my best friends who is ginger I have noticed that they seem to do well with girls, and they all have quite unusual ( not in a strange way ) personnalities ;)
so: 1# life is too short to worry about it
2# just keep social and fully find your personality and just give it time and someone will come allong who loves you ;)
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2007): I have ginger hair n im only 12...im gonna use loreal paris golden brown cos loadsa guyys in my year look great when they dyed it ... and Dawnest, I will never be on a cat walk.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2007): ginger is NOT the worst hair color!! I almost lost all my hair due to bleaching it so I could dye it ginger!!! Ginger's are hot!!! And the freckles are cute (in girl terms, that's good) not to mention you gingers have a reputation for being funny and a little cocky, and having a bit of a temper, which, although surprising as it may seem, many women find attractive. Maybe it's not the fact that you're ginger, maybe it's the fact that you're self-concious about it. Start making jokes about it, laugh it off when people take a piss out of you, and eventually they'll start to get to know you for you, and not your hair. I used to get made fun of all the time because I have almost no boobs. Once I started laughing about it, and decided not to care, people actually started to prefer me to the more voluptuous girls!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2007): OMG!! You poor blokes!! You should stop by the states!! We love red hair here! I went to London a couple years ago, met a ginger bloke, he was the sweetest, funniest guy I ever met, and I'm still with him!! Go gingers!!!On that note, the funniest people I have ever known, were redheads :-) Awesome
...............................
A
male
reader, paul brogden +, writes (28 September 2007):
im a ginger guy who cant seem to get a white english girl friend as english girls avoid guys with ginger hair im slim 6 foot tall blue eyes live in leeds in yorkshie in the uk i seem to get a lot of interest from black girls or asian girls but would love a white girl to have a family with one day. Feel free to email me on the site.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2007): Red hair is never a problem in a relationship and you should be sooo proud of your hair. It's a rare hair colour and beautiful.
My advice is be and stay confident while they bully you.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2007): I dote on ginger guys, I only date gingers, I love them love them love them! xD;
...............................
A
male
reader, neilevans +, writes (1 March 2007):
The hair colour thing has become bigger in the UK over the last ten years. I have dark blond hair, but i have to say, women do talk about dark hair alot. I think it has become a feminine thing to do, but i will say that there is such a thing as personal taste and it varies from person to person.
Go out and meet people and forget morons who take the piss out of your ginger hair.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2007): i fancy a ginger guy he is well nice . I told him LOL when i was a bit drunk at a party and he just looked at me like i was nuts and told me to shhh. dont be silly LOL. Whatever that was supposed to mean i dont know! I dont think that i am ugly.
My advice, a mans confidence goes along way.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2007): HI!
i absolutely LOVE ginger guys!!! seriously! i see someone whos ginger and im like WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ginger guys have such cute freckles and seriously i dont know why you should have a problem with getting a girlfriend cos u sound HOT to me!!!!!! Just be yourself because thats all you can be, looks arent everything you know. If you find it hard to get a girlfriend maybe you dont have enough places to find one. perhaps you could join a local youth group? i hope this helps.... i love ginger guys!!! :P xxx
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2006): my boyfriend has bright ginger hair and freckles. He says Im the hottest girl he has ever been out with and that his dad said "wow how did you get her?" he also said all his mates are really impressed. What does that say about the people around him? that they are surprised he got someone? its complimentary to me but it also implies i have bad taste in men.
I happen to think he is the most gorgeous man ever, I fancy the pants off him, I cant keep my hands off him, love him to bits and to be honest I have always had a thing about ginger hair and freckles are adorable.
in school people will pick on silly things "ginger minger!" and "specky four eyes" and "Fat cow!" I remember I actually got picked on for having big boobs! can you imagine a girl being called and picked on for having big boobs?! ha hha but i was!! my life was made a misery for it!
What I am saying is people at your age are stupid! ha ha a and when you get a couple of years older you will realise how attractive you are because of your hair not inspite of it.
x
...............................
A
male
reader, TheActor +, writes (16 October 2006):
K, i'm going around giving out this advice because it worked so fricken well for me. Read 'The Game' by Neil Strauss, it has some really good tips that build confidence a lot, and shows how females think a bit.
Your red hair will be an awesome 'peacock' feature =D (just read the book xD )
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2006): I feel your pain mate, but dont let it get you down. I felt the same when I was younger, all the girls got on at me for my hair, but the truth is, all the girls that bully you are the ones that acually fancy you, there just too shy to admit it.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2006): hey fellow ginger guy!!! i had the same worries at 18! im 23 now and growing up with ginger hair i always felt different and at a disadvantage but now ive realised that thinking i was at a disadvantage i worked at my personality and sense of humour and that teamed with the fact that most people couldnt care less about hair colour proves that you will have no problems meeting women!!! you're only 18, you shouldnt be thinking long term relationships and instead work on building rapport with women and developing your confidence. trust me confidence, intelligence and ginger hair and youll have no problem with women!!! good luck to you!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2006): ginger guys are hott!!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2006): Don't worry. I love gyus with ginger hair and freckles. Ginger hair are original. I dont think that I am the only one who fancys redheaded boys so I am sure you will find girlfriend.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2006): I agree with all of the answers about hair colour not being at all significant when it comes to relationships.However, if you wanted to you could try dyeing your hair another colour to see for yourself whether it makes a difference or just for a change. Go for it and good luck!x
...............................
A
female
reader, willywombat +, writes (15 April 2006):
 I adore red hair....my hubby has dark brown hair and a ginger goatee, but my son (who I put on order in for, and got exactly what I requested, has ginger hair!!!!). All the famous guys I fancy or have fancied have red hair.... Damien Lewis, Axl Rose, the cute ginger guy out of Green wing, josh homme I could carry on.
Look, the reason you dont have a girl yet isnt to do with your hair, its probably more to do with your confidence. Build up your confidence and do what I tell my son to do....realise you are gorgeous, unique, fabulous ginger.....it'll ahppen. Honest it really will!!!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2006): Hi I am a very fit attractive blonde lady and i have never and probably wont ever date anyone who does not have red hair. I am not the only one either you have a neish market exploit it believe me lots of girls do ginger big time -I do
Debs
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2006): My boyfriend has ginger hair. We're 19. A lot of girls love him because he's unique, creative, funny and intelligent, charming, andot to mention absolutely gorgeous, with amazing ginger hair. You probably need to be more outgoing and all that. I'm sure you are extremely charming. It's all in the charm. Oh, and don't listen to that idiot who says to be cocky. Stupid girls like cocky guys.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2006): I have red hair and used to get taunted in school. In fact, even as an adult I have had one or two losers who have been quite unkind about my red hair (but I suspect that one of these guys actually fancied me!) - but the people who make these kind of comments about the way a person looks is a shallow loser and not worth bothering with. However, on the flip side, I know many people who think red hair is amazing and I get lots of positive comments too! I must admit some comments and jokes do get to me at times, but then most of the negative comments are completely tired and unoriginal. The media can be the worst - they seem to be shocked when a red head displays talent or that a red head can be good-looking. I used to think the same as you but now I realise that hair colour has nothing to do with your success with the opposite sex. In fact, bar one, every single red head I know is married. My ex-boyfriend had a thing for Gillian Anderson - he obviously had a soft spot for red-heads! I know there are plenty of women out there who have a soft spot for red-heads too. I'd rather have my hair colour any day of the week - far better to be called a 'fiery' redhead, even if you've heard it a million times before, than the comments the other hair colours receive, don't you think? Just work on you self-esteem - you'll get there.
...............................
A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (9 January 2006):
 I can't understand your problem. I'm as female as anyone, and I think ginger-haired guys look hot!
Why are you letting something that you can't change (and that's basically very appealing because it's so rare) get in the way of your love life? Blaming a normal lack of success on hair colour is just weird. Would women knock you back because you have blue eyes, or because you're double-jointed on your left thumb? I don't think so...
All 18-year-old guys think they're failures with women. That's because a lot 18-year-old women don't really know what they want and haven't really grown up yet. So don't set your sights on a longterm relationship right at the moment. Ask girls out with the aim of simply getting to know some women your age, and having some fun.
If you get turned down, that's perfectly normal. Nobody had a 100% success rate. In fact, if one woman in five accepts, that's pretty good.
Wait a few years and you'll find that women your age will act a bit more settled. Then you'll find that your strike rate when you ask them out will be much better.
Don't worry. It'll sort itself out, and if you're really concerned about the lack on interest by the other sex, then ask for some constructive feedback from female relatives and friends. Ask them to give you some pointers about the way you go about asking girls out. You might be surprised about what works and more importantly, what doesn't.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2006): A freind of mine is ginger. He is 17 the same age as me, and has got his girlfreind pregnant. I am not saying go there! But if he can go there, then you can get somthing going.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2006): Dont blame it on the hair colour. Make some moves. I have ginger hair too. Believe me, its not a problem...you just need to get out there more. Actually, a few friends of mine who are girls have said that ginger is a great colour as it is more unusual and not same ol', same ol'(not just casual talk either...they are all with ginger guys at the moment). Take up a hobby....hit some clubs with your friends. Believe me...it WILL happen.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2006): Become cocky and think you're all that. I enjoy cocky guys....even if they're not hot.
xoxo
...............................
A
female
reader, TaylorMay +, writes (8 January 2006):
 Are yu sure there is really a problem, or is it sumthing you dont like which is making you paranoud.speaking from experience at one point i thoght my nose was really big and it got so bad that i thought people were noticing it
which makes you hate it
when in realaty it doesent matter
you are you and people will love for you not you haircolour or how tall you arebe urself and be proud to be YOU ??!!!!! lots of love hunni
...............................
A
female
reader, Dawnest +, writes (8 January 2006):
Loud whooping noises, baring your bottom and jumping up and down seems to work for chimpanzees. Maybe you should try that to get the girls to notice you.
I would suggest taking up an interest or hobby/skating or bowling all hold teams of girls and if you are friendly and helpful, believe me, no one will care if you have tiger stripes in your hair. Besides, ginger is the new blondeon the world's catwalks.
...............................
|
