A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi there, so my boyfriend of two months is currently in rehab and he's upset because it's one that's quite neglected, without much support.I have been very supportive, phoning him as much as possible, bringing him things to make him feel better (like tasty treats i know he'll enjoy) and visiting as much as I can. His family and loved ones are not around, which makes the whole process harder.Anyway,the other day he started fighting with me on the phone! he implied that i am one of the people who have done nothing for him. I couldn't believe it. It really hurt to hear this and i told him it's unfair. He sounded so mad on the phone and then ended the call with me.What makes it worse is that this is not the first time this has happened... He has fought with me over things i have not done in the past, also shouting and making me feel crappy. Since this incident happened, i have not called him back at the rehab. i really don't know what to do but it was unfair and it frightens me because a few days previously he was THANKING me for all i have done. It's like i never know what he's gonna be like towards me and i feel i don't deserve such behaviour.Am i wrong to keep my distance even though he's in rehab? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Zimbini  +, writes (3 October 2014):
I guess something must have gone by that time but he has no right to shout at you but you need to confirm whether he meant what he said before keeping distance. And to keep distance can't solve your problems you have to face them. You need to know what you want in order to prosper in life.
A
female
reader, Intrigued3000  +, writes (2 October 2014):
 I think you should go with the flow of how you feel. Don't make it a black or white situation where you make extreme decisions. If you feel the need to keep the distance for now, then do it, and when you feel the need to reach out to him again, do it. You also have to take care of your mental health. I think because he is going through rehab, he is going to be very irritable and may lash out at people. Since you are the only one who calls and visits him, you will be the recipient of his withdrawal anger. Just keep in mind that he does not mean half of what he says in anger, so don't take it personally. If you feel that this kind of relationship is too much for you to handle emotionally, then don't feel obligated to stay with him. Follow what you feel is right for you.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (1 October 2014):
 Nope, you are right to stay out of his rehab.
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