A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I guess I would like a bit of reassurance. My boyfriend broke up with me a week ago now, and I think I am struggling to cope with it. We had only been together for 7 months, but I had started to fall in love with him. He did say in liked me but that he couldn't tell me he loved me just yet. That was ok, as some people need more time to be able to say those kinda things. The thing is, I really did think he liked me. Over the last few weeks he had started to fail to phone when he said he would (he said this was due to him having his children over) although this never stopped him phoning before. I brought it up one night, and we had a full on conversation about it. within the next week he had finished it. He texted me to tell me he couldn't handle the relationship anymore. I feel totally hurt that he finished it this way with me. He is 40 and should know that that was not the right way to handle it, he should have told me to my face. I feel a fool for having fell for him so quickly. The strange thing was that only 3 weeks ago he brought up me meeting his children (I had not meet them before as he didn't want to introduce me to them until he was sure about the relationship) but then last week he is saying things like 'I never wanted a relationship'. I'm confused. The worse of it is he still hasn't phoned me, so now I'm left thinking 'did this guy even like me in the first place' which is silly I know, because he did, you know when someone likes you. I guess I'm feeling a bit of a failure at the moment. I just seem so unhappy and I am struggling to deal with this. I just want someone to share my life with, he said he did too. Do you think that he has just got cold feet, and that he may change his mind? Or am I just wasting my time even thinking about a man who thought it was acceptable to finish a relationship by text? Thanks for reading this, and any help anyone may be able to give about handling a break up would be appreciated!
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female
reader, Entirely Unique +, writes (22 March 2010):
 This is one of the reasons I really dis-like text messaging, I like it for so many reasons but it really has made some people complete cowards on things that should be said face to face at a push if that's really not possible then by phone at least.
I would give it abit of time, if you still haven't heard from him in that time I would just send a text asking him if he would like to talk, if you don't get a reply or you get a 'no' then walk away completely and try to let go.
If you get a yes and you still feel something for him then try to see if you can find out what it was that made him go from one extreme to another, maybe something scared him off, no one is perfect and sometimes we react badly to things and regret it later.
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