A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm 29 years old and really want badly to have a career, and I would like to go to graduate school, but I am so scared that it's too late. I realize that technically a graduate school might accept someone of my age, but that at 29 I would be in a sea of 21-22-year olds, and I would feel like the "grandma" of the class. I guess that that would be better than simply NEVER going to graduate school, but I worry that my age would be a detriment to my getting accepted. Discrimination, ostensibly, is illegal but there's no way to guarantee that it won't happen to me, and I'm behind everyone else (most people have their master's by my age). The trouble is, that if I pursue a Master's degree then by the time I finish it I'll probably be too old to get married and have children!My heart is breaking, because I want a career but I also want to have a husband and children of my own, and I should have had those things sooner, but it didn't work out, and now I'm running out of time. There is no guy in my life right now, and I've had no luck finding one, but if I were to marry, then I don't see how I could go to graduate school. I could be wrong but I worry that getting married would shut the door on higher education for me. However, I want BADLY to have a profession. I graduated with a degree in Spanish and got a job as a translator in a law firm, and I HATED it. I realize that I'm behind and that I should have a master's and I should be married and have children, but I was on the wrong track for a long time. For years, I'd been planning on being an attorney and going to law school, but a series of experiences my last year of college and my first year out in the real world opened up my eyes to the fact that that would be a wrong move. Now I'm adrift and not sure what to do... I feel ashamed of not having a profession and really want one, but it was a lot of upheaval after I'd planned my future for years and then lost all enthusiasm for it. I don't want to go back to law school, and be an attorney, I'm definitely in the wrong field now, and right now I am in the process of changing careers. I'm studying a certificate to teach English as a foreign language... it's not a masters just certification. The reason I'm doing it is because I want to live abroad again. I studied abroad in Mexico when I was a senior in college and thought that I would get it all out of my system, but now I'm more restless than ever and I feel like I need to have another adventure or I'll just explode.If I were to go to grad school I would rather go abroad, because I really loved living abroad. Also, I want to return to Latin America (where I studied) because I have a better chance of finding a husband there. There are latin men at my church but they seem to be "taken."My mom keeps telling me to be a dental hygienist, because the benefits are good, but I would HATE it. I don't want to spend the next 40 years doing something my heart's not in. I don't want to be miserable. If you're 29 years old, or 30, or older, how big of a detriment is age if you want to enroll in graduate school? What do you do when you planned a particular profession all your life, and then have an epiphany and realize it's not for you (as in my case, where I decided not to be a lawyer, and now I'm totally lost as to what to do), and realize that time is running out?How do you decide between having a family of your own and a career?I feel so torn!I'm panicking because I realize that if I want a master's that I'm running out of time, and I'm not even sure what I would want to do. Regardless of what people tell me, I would hate being a dental hygienist or a nurse. No offense to anyone who does those things but it's not for me. I'd rather butcher pigs. Ditto for going back to law school and being an attorney. I don't want to butcher pigs, for that matter. I just want to be happy but scared that it's too late!I've been feeling very sad lately because nearly everyone that went to my junior high and my high school is already married and has children of their own. I don't want to choose between being never having a family, and never having the education I dreamed of. If you can help me, thank you.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2008): You are never too old.
If you trully want to do this, you'll make it work with the marriage somehow.
It WILL be a lot of work, but in the end, it will all be worth it won't it.
I mean, you are only 29. In no sense of the word is that old.
Flynn 24
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2008): Hi sweety!
Listen it is NEVER too late 2 further your studies.Think about it,u want 2 have children and 2 be a wife but I'm sure you don't want 2 be dependant on your husband and not be able to provide for your children as much as you could.
You know I personally think life is too short 2 be stuck in a place where u'r not happy.it really doesn't matter if ur classmates r 22 bcs its not about them.You shud just work towards your goal and not let any1 sidetrack u!go 4 it gal!
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