A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Lately I've been thinking about future relationships and stuff, and it's just hit me that even if I did get a girlfriend, I would have no idea what to do with her. I do not like the bar or club scene at all. I cannot and do not like to dance and the thought of hanging out at some bar drinking until 3 am seems weird to me. I also do not like over-crowded places or people in general when they get drunk. Here's what I do: Wake up Go to classes (if I have any that day) Go to work (if I'm working that day) Go to the gym (if it's a workout day) Browse several forums and websites for a few hours Play games for a bit Sleep Repeat + Go out with friends once every few weeks. Am I too boring and weird to ever get a girlfriend?
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drunk, get a girlfriend Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Serpico +, writes (21 March 2016):
That you even ask the question tells me you are not aggressive or confident enough to generally attract women. Take charge, be confident, and approach with the expectation that she will be interested. Sulk in the corner about being too boring and you will get just what you deserve.
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (20 March 2016):
Frankly, that schedule you keep damn near put me to sleep before I finished reading it!!!!!
YOU can "do" whatever you darn well please, in life! (Assuming you'll be doing "legal" things....)
Don't worry... some cute girl is going to catch your eye, some day... and you will be hooked ... and you and she will figure out lots of things you have in-common.... and you'll day, "Damn, I can't imagine that I ever asked such a question...."
Good luck...
P.S. Taking dance lessons is a GREAT WAY to meet women...
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2016): Besides those you have mentioned , do you have any goals you want to accomplish in your life? like being the CEO of a large company or a distinguished doctor or an artist ? Are there things in which you believe passionately, such as politics,religion, humanitarian issues, sports etc? Do you like nice clothes, sport cars or cars in general, music? can you play any musical instrument? Do you like poetry, painting , sculpture, history? Do you like reading ? Please think if you can have or do any of these things. Because these are the things that make up our personalities and make us different as individuals from others and make us interesting persons to others.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (19 March 2016):
I agree with FA, the biggest thing holding you back is your lack of socializing. Going out with friends every few weeks.. it's kinda bordering on anti social behavior.
I don't know how often I see posts written by girls/women who's partner is a gamer (nothing wrong with gaming) and they feel utterly left out. And to be frank, if your partner rather shoot up aliens or build medieval castles than interact with you... it's not much of a relationships. So something to consider.
Same with the browsing the internet a few hours.. Do you think that is an activity that works for a couple?
The thing is there ARE plenty of girls JUST like you out there. It comes down to finding someone you SHARE things in common with, it CAN be playing the same online game, it can be a hobby etc.
But YOU are in your 20's - you schedule is more dull than my 75 year old dad's.!
Not drinking is fine, actually I think it's a huge plus.
But you GOT to have so LIFE in you too!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2016): I never went to bars or clubs with my boyfriend or exes. We watch movies, go hiking, visit new restaurants and try interesting cuisines, window shopping, sightseeing in our own city, visit museums, visit theme parks, hang out in the park, picnic, barbecue, go to the beach or Boardwalk, cook together at home, enjoy music or concerts, and go to local events... You get my point. You spend your time on the internet all day - why not make use of that skill and search for date ideas?
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A
female
reader, kateisme +, writes (19 March 2016):
I think there are so much things that you can do with your partner other than the bars. Frankly speaking, i do not go to the bars/clubs with my partner!
She can join you at your place to play boardgames or online games. Basically i do not mind to just watch tv with my partner. Its about spending quality time together. I am sure you will find someone who appreciates that :))
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (19 March 2016):
I am much like you, very boring. I can't drink and I like my 8 hours of sleep every night strictly. I am 35 and I realized while there is happily ever after, but there is no passionately ever after. Happiness is not determined by how many exciting events you do together. It is observing the simple nuances of every day. The routines and the slight changes in lifestyle as we age every day. Most couples get by, by doing the list you wrote and then most shared activities are sex, meals and movies. When they have kids then they do activities like children museum and nature playground, or a once a year trip to Disney's. You would adjust your online time by 3 hours and cut it to just 1 hour when you live with someone you care about.
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (19 March 2016):
You are not doing anything that brings you face to face social interaction. That is all you need to add. There should be opportunities in your classes work and gym, but a hobby not connected to the internet would improve your situation.
Your avoidance of alcohol is a positive thing.
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