A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I'm in love with this amazing guy and he had a kid in April. His ex gf cheated on him three times 2 times before she was pregnant and once when she was and treated him like crap. She walks all over him all the time wont let him take his baby on weekends, takes off with the baby, meanwhile he spends money for his boy all the time. It obvious he loves his son and wants to be there for him, but he's always getting walked on. She calls him up crying one day about some guy who was only interested in her for sex and my guy is all like awww and kissing her ass.. do i not have a right to be upset about it?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2008): I can relate and I completely understand how you feel. I have been dating this very nice guy for a little over a year now. He has a daughter that is turning 4 and of course there's the ex factor. She's horrendous to him. She comes to the house- barks at him.. constantly calling.. calling him names in front of the baby.. blah blah..always crossing the lines. It's my first time dealing with this and it hurts to see the one that you love being walked all over because he wants to see his baby and have that basic father/daughter relationship. It's hard. So.. to answer your question you have every right to be upset. But you also must have a serious chat with him. Tell him how you feel. What you would like and what needs to stop. Relationships with the ex involving a baby should be short and sweet out of respect for you. She's always going to be there and if it's something that you're willing to deal with than my heart is with you. I've decided to see where my relationship goes. Just remember.. that if he is not the big fish that you've always wanted to catch - there will be thousands of others out there waiting to be caught by you. Good luck!!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2008): You don't have a right to be upset that his ex is who she is...If she wants to treat him that way, that's not really your problem. Furthermore, there are two sides to the story. In that regard I don't think it is your business.
What IS your business is the way your boyfriend handles his relationship with his ex out of respect for you. And for him to sit and listen to her guy problems is, in my opinion, disrespectful and completely inappropriate. His communication with her should be short and formal, especially out of respect for you. But he hasn't done this...however, she is not the one to blame, HE is.
Your anger and disillusionment should be towards HIM, not towards her. And if you think maybe he has too much baggage and he is not giving you your proper respect then I really think you should just bounce. You don't need that. And it really does sound like he has too much baggage and he is way too attached still to this other woman, and you need a guy whose attention is fully on you...don't waste your time any longer...
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