A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have this guy who is (in my eyes) just a friend. I honestly could never like him as anything more than that. He just isn't my type at all, romantically. Well, in early November, he broke up with his girlfriend (one of my close friends) just out of the blue (none of us saw it coming at all). He couldn't give her a legitimate reason for ending the relationship and it ended up hurting her a lot. Well, lately, he has been texting me quite a bit. He will ask me to go to dinner with him (we live on separate floors of the same dorm, right next to a cafeteria), to the grocery store, the gym, etc. At first I just thought it was him being friendly but lately it's like...every day. And it's driving me nuts. OR he'll text me and be like, "hey, I know we tease each other a lot, but I just want you to know that I consider you to be a really good friend and I'm glad we've gotten to know each other so well this semester." And he'll text me this stuff at really random times. Am I overreacting? I don't want to come across as being self-obsessed/arrogant, but I do not like this guy nor would I ever date him in a million years, as harsh as that sounds (it's a combination of girl code since he dated my friend and the fact that we really just don't have anything in common). I have been best friends with his roommate since high school, so would it be inappropriate for me to tell him that he should drop some hints to this guy that maybe he should back off? What is going on? Help me!
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (5 December 2012):
 yeah it sounds like this guy is interested in you.
I don't think you need to drop hints at all.
Just don't' respond to texts that don't require a response
and when he asks to do things... be busy A LOT. IF he asks you point blank for a date or if you are interested you can say to him that while you consider him a good friend you would not consider dating him and leave it at that. If he PUSHES you for a reason (and sometimes they do) I'd tell him the truth "I just don't see you that way and there is nothing you can do or say that will change that"
A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (5 December 2012):
All you have to do is respect the space between the two of you and not do things couples normally do and you will be fine. You can't control his feelings so eventually he might pop them on you. Just politely reject him and give him your honest answers just as you have to us. These things happen and some girls lose sight of boundaries but it is important to know that they always exist when you are not interested in someone. It is a part of life.
But this is assuming the idea that he has feelings for you (which I think he does) but the way he is texting means that he wants to be your friend first so that you can see his good side or trust him. Either way don't reply to those kinds of texts. Keep focused and good luck in your college.
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