A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I am 24 and recently got back together with my boyfriend of 4 years (we had a years break, as i felt the relationship was not progressing). Anyway, since getting back together, he has been making every effort to make things work out, and make me happy. I however can not help but wonder if i am doing the right or wrong thing by starting our relationship up again. We decided to move in together in one months time, and have recently signed a years lease in a great house. Since signing, i have been even more worried as to whether we are doing the right thing. Reasons for my worry, is that, for example - 2 years ago when i started working where i am currently, i developed a crush on a co-worker (who i do not know very well)and i never did anything about it, two days ago, i found out he has a crush on me - ever since finding this out, i cant get this man out of my head, which is making me feel very bad. Should i be thinking of other men if i am about to move in with my boyfriend? Secondly, my boyf and I had a good sex life before we broke up, but since getting back together, it just doesnt feel right at all for me. I dont know what to do. Am i making a big mistake moving in with him for a year? Should i pull out now before we move in? Or am i just being a worry wort? Thanks so much, i would really appreciate your advise. X
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male
reader, SleeplessNSeattle +, writes (3 November 2008):
If you have feelings for someone else, give it a really good brainstorm and do some soul-searching with some time alone. You only live your life once and there's not enough time to look over your shoulder and regret a decision for the rest of your life.(Not to mention the financial crisis you could get into with a house). From my own experience, I have thought several times about my wife in this manner. I thought I was in love with another woman, but the more time I spent thinking about it...as the days and weeks went by I realized how much of a mistake it would be to just drop everything and go running off after a fantasy.
My personal opinion would urge you to merely sit down and talk with your current boyfriend. Ask him if his feelings and behavior towards you since you got back together are truly genuine. Honesty is a very good approach to your situation.
My ultimate advice is to stick with what you have, unless you're strong enough to let it go and know that in the end it would be for the best.
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