A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I have been working along side this girl for about 8 months now and I am nothing short of crazy about her. My problem is she confuses the hell out of me. She seems to act differently around me compaired to everyone else. I dont want to ruin our relationship as we have to work together so asking here is pretty much out of the question unless i can figure here out.She lives about 4 hours away from me so we only see each other for a few days a month but spend hours every day talking on the phone. She is absolutely stunning and gets asked out a lot however has been single for around 2 years due to a really bad breakup she had before (which she has told me all about).She is very flirty with everyone and always looks like she belongs on a catwalk this being said when its just the two of us she often dresses down wearing jeans and a vest top or something similar.Lately I did make a comment to her about not making an effort for me and she simply said "well I knew you wouldnt really care what I wore at all and I like to be comfortable so I wore this" (not word for word but thats the rough jist) my reply was man you would look good in a bin bag...smooth eh?Shes also not very flirty with me however there are moments when it really is quite extreme flirtation between us followed by a strange silence and a lot of giggling (yes we are both quite immature). Lately I was down in here home city visiting her and she invited me over to hers for dinner to meet her brother and sister the whole evening she kind of showed me off stating various things I can do.On one hand Id say she loves to spend time with me and just hang out. She knows Im a very casual (jeans and tshirt) kinda person and shes obviously mimicking this when we are together. She also phones me or texts me to phone her as she knows that "if I phone you Ill get into trouble as we talk for so long" (this is using our work phones by the way). The fact she doesnt flirt with me much kinda weirds me out when she so openly flirts with everyone else.She also takes onboard everything I tell her or say so much so shes adopted a lot of my phrases etc. I clearly have no idea what Im doing here with her. The fact she treats me like she doesnt treat anyone else makes me believe that either shes into me or shes just really comfortable with me in the typical "friends" zone!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2009): I think you should go for it, ask her out and tell her you're interested in her beyond what you guys currently have. tell her you're done "playing games". The fact that she seems to enjoy your company and you guys flirt is winning half the battle. so One day take her to a place where you two can talk privately.
There isnt a manual where it says you have to be friends first before being BF GF. Sometimes you drift into the friend zone a bit too much so it'll be awkward to be something more. SOmetimes measuring the "time" to make a move its a mistake. There's always the right time or nothing.
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