A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have recently split up from my boyfriend of three months. We met every Saturday for four years when I served him on his shopping trips. I enjoyed seeing him every Saturday and blushed when he was queuing up at my checkout. We chatted every time but were always too shy to express our feelings every time, which we both regretted. He did, however, have a girlfriend at the time, which meant that nothing could have happened, so made me feel slightly better! It wasn't until May of this year, after a few chats online and via text that we started seeing each other. He was still in a relationship but we met up occasionally for a short time after his shifts on his way home. We enjoyed these short meetings and felt comfortable around each other. A few weeks later, he split up with her and we began to spend more time together. At first, I felt kind of responsible for their split, as he did it just after seeing me. He kept telling me that he wasn't happy with her for a long time but just kept it going. In June, when I went for my two week vacation, he kept in touch with me via text every day and was extremely supportive, caring and kind. A man of my dreams... he was the person I missed most and the first person who spent the night with me on my return. Soon, we decided to get to know each other better. I stayed over at his place and we spent lots of time together - going out, cooking at home etc. We remained in touch via text message when we were apart. Everything was going super, and, within a few weeks, I even met his mother's side of the family, who likes me too!Despite these good times, he raised the sex issue. Being a virgin and having the mentality to 'value' it, I kept on declining. In addition, I was un-ready and scared, which I explained to him. He insisted that our relationship was up to the next level and cannot progress without it. Aside from this issue, he seems less uncaring and supportive than the guy I had in mind when I was on holiday. He tells me I want too much. Now that we have seperated, I have been thinking about him more than before and listening to 'his' music. Sometimes stuff which happens everyday remind me of him. I know I haven't come to terms with the split, but at the same time I am wondering if I feel miss him because I want him back, or have just split up 'too early'? I have also tried to stop myself from replying to his texts, but I'm not sure whether we should at least remain friends, or stop all communication completely?Grrr. What shall I do? Are his opinions on sex correct? Am I expecting too much support from him or is he just a waste of space, whom I should forget about and move on? Please help.
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female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (2 November 2010):
 At the end of the day your virginity is yours to give to whom you want to give it to when you want to give it to them and if he can't respect that then he's not your dream guy.
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