A
female
age
36-40,
*utesypiefm
writes:I recently got married a week ago and we never had sex. I married my college sweet heart u could say and i do love him dearly. whenever were together were always having fun, but when it comes to sex we just pull apart. note that im a virgin and so is he. we decided to leave the sex for marrige. Now we are married but were not having sex and im seriously thinking of a divorce because its just wrong what im doing to him. we did try sex a couple of times and it was extremely difficult because im tight. now im not even letting him touch me. I feel so bad for that. Should i get a divorce because im doing him wrong? but i'll never have another person who loves me dearly and treats me the same.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Medea  +, writes (25 July 2010):
 Do you usually give up easily when things get a bit tough? is marriage means that little to you? what would you do when face the next hurdle? Get help not divorced!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2010): take your time, and dont think that sex is difficult, take it slow, do foreplay and slowly have sex, it will be easier, trust me.
good luck
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A
female
reader, FluffyPie  +, writes (23 July 2010):
 You say you're tight... Well, let me tell you that the vagina is made to "suffer" ANY penis size, so no worries. I lost my virginity a few weeks ago and I was tight and scared like hell, but he got inside after all. All you need is to get very wet (if you want, you can use lube, if you can't get naturally wet, use finger, a lot of foreplay etc), so he can slip inside easily.
So, yes, go and have fun :)
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A
female
reader, JK8833 +, writes (23 July 2010):
It is way too soon to be thinking of divorce over this if it's only been a week. If you two really love each other you can work through this. There will be a lot of challenges up ahead of you in a marriage and you can't just give up so easily. Marriage is about being a team and working together. Keep trying in the bedroom, lots of foreplay is a must. Be patient and honest with him. If he is doing something that hurts you speak up, but also speak up of he is doing something right. Guys are not mind readers!!! Try hard to relax (maybe a glass of wine or 2) because if you tense up it will be more painful. It maybe uncomfortable the first couple of times but then it will be wonderful. If after a couple of months of trying it still hurts go see a doctor. There are a couple of medical things that could be wrong but can be treated i.e vaginismus. Or you maybe extremely small (tight) and estrogen cream can help this. That was the case with my best friend and now she and her hubby have a great sex life. There are a lot of websites out there with information, just google painful sex and see what you can find out. Seriously though, don't think of getting a divorce over this, your husband loves you he wants you for you and not just sex. Just try not to pull away from him, that can lead to hurt feelings and resentment.
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A
female
reader, johannabanana +, writes (23 July 2010):
 If you get lube, everything should go a lot smoother. If you continue to have a problem don't just trow in the towel on the whole marriage! Go see a sex doctor.
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