A
female
age
30-35,
*isahorn_1
writes:This winter my boyfriend decided to take a 2 month trip to europe. We had only been dating 5months, so obviously our relationship wasn't going to "stop" him from travelling, but we were both in love, and the distance apart for so long was hard on both of us, especially me. He's always going to be a traveller, and he's always wanted to travel to Australia to work for a couple months, and travel for a month type thing. We talked about waiting a year, until I was done school, and going together, which we were both totally excited for. Now, he's thinking he'd like to go this winter (which isn't an option for me, because of school) for three and a half months. This really upsets me. We're both very much in love, and have talked about the future, spending our lives together, etc, so is it wrong for me to be upset that he is going to screw off for 1/4 of the year, especially after we talked about taking this trip TOGETHER? Am I being selfish because I don't want him to go without me, and because I think he's being selfish leaving me for so long, so he can travel the world and come back to me when it's convenient for him?Any advice would be greatly appreciated!! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2009): If he's deadset on going without you (which yes, I think is selfish for him to leave for so long-definitely seems like he wants the relationship when it's convenient for him and if you don't fit in then he's going to do what he wants without you) then ask him for a ring before he goes.But really, who leaves their significant other for that long and just expects to pick up where the relationship ended off before they left type thing? And, according to your post, this isn't the first time and doesn't sound like it'll be the last. Are you sure he's as committed as you are? Sounds like you are very much in love, and would bend over backwards for him, and it seems like he is taking advantage of that. I mean, you didn't leave him the first time he "screwed off," to do his own thing, so what would make him think this time would be any different? I dunno hunny, but I'd say if he loves you like you say he does, he'd wait for you, or, if he really can't wait to go, he'd put a ring around your finger first. Best of luck hun!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2009): This man has the travel bug and he is more in love with travelling than being with you.Sounds like either you fit in with his plans or he goes without you.Start to rethink if this is the man you really want to spend your life with. Here one minute gone the next!!!
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