A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I work at a restaurant with my girlfriend. We just got into a big fight which was my fault. So we’ve barley spoken for a few days. I come into work and i notice my gf getting her shirt sleeves rolled up by a guy coworker. Then i see she’s playing with him by scaring him when he’s around the corner. Now i know those are harmless things amoungst coworkers. but what bothers me is that those are the things we do. She always asks me to fix her shirt. and we are always scaring each other. I feel like if i asked a female coworker to roll my sleeves in front of my gf. she would be like “why didn’t you ask me”. I know it’s an innocent gesture but it seemed to me she was flirting with him. Then they were talking to each other way more than usual.I wonder if she did it on purpose in front of me, or is over me and just flirting away, or if it was innocent, although i do know her and that’s an odd thing for her to do. Should i be worried about this? Or am i being paranoid? thanks in advance all!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2018): I think your gf is being very mean, inconsiderate, thoughtless and immature. She needs to grow up and stop acting like a bratty child. If you made up, she should be mature enough to put the fight behind you and behave like an adult. I would definitely think twice about someone who treats me that way. She is showing her true colours.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (18 September 2018):
 You need to stop nitpicking everything you see. If it's to make yourself look or feel better over that big fight (which you said was your fault)... then you really need to stop. This whole I did something stupid so now I'm looking for faults in HER behavior too.. it's SO childish!
It look like she doesn't mind that it makes you jealous, so.... was the fight over you flirting with a girl perhaps?
But here is the thing, you are BOTH? in your 30's? Then START acting like ADULTS!
You post sounds like a couple of teenagers.
Either you trust her words or you don't. And if you don't, then WHY are you with her?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2018): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSo i talked to her about it. she says that’s how they always are and that it means nothing. hmm i’ve never seen them act like that in front of me. so if i’m there at work and she doesn’t play around with him but when i’m not there they are? what does that mean. what is her thought process.
i really want to believe her but it just doesn’t seem to add up. now am i being super paranoid?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2018): I think she has endorsed that this is the way to behave around other people.She sees it as likeable friendly behaviour.After all she got married to you so what could be wrong?I think you need to be more discerning about what is flirting.I mean that you cant be playing "boo" and then jumping into sexual action.It surely doesnt all start with sleeve rolling?No, I think you subconsciously give each other different sexual cues.Maybe you stroke her hair or kiss her neck softly.Perhaps she snuggles up closely to you and places her hand under your tshirt.These are things to be jealous of, not shirtrolling and scare the grownup.Reassess the real things you do to initiate sexual contact and you might agree.If you dont do these subtle sexual cues then maybe you should consider being a little more adventurous in your physical interactions.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2018): She's trying to make you jealous, clearly. I doubt the quality of this girl's mind. She just wants to make it look very innocent. This is classic "make your partner jealous by acting close to somebody of the opposite sex" move. Given the juvenile personality of you both, this kind of power play is quite recognizable. I'm sorry, no offense but you need to grow up and also date more grown up people yourself.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2018): I'm a guy and I think she's doing that intentionally to get your attention I guess, it's not biggie but your reaction is probably what she wanted, to cause some kind of concern so that you'll pay more attention to her.
If it turns out to be innocent then I'm probably just too sensitive.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (17 September 2018):
 It sounds innocent to me, I don't know your girlfriend so I am not sure if this is normal behavior for her or not with her coworkers. If its not then she is showing you she doesn't need you in her life. She could be sulking. If you were to blame for the fight then the best thing to do is talk to her at home and apologize and try and work it out between you both. Working together can be dangerous in a relationship because it can cause tension in the work place and involve other people.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (17 September 2018):
Oh, she is playing YOU.
She is showing you in the must "innocuous" way how easily she can replace you.
Keep your relationship drama out of the work place.
If YOU fucked up and cause a fight/argument - the be the bigger person and apologize and sort it out.
You are both grown adults, act like grown adults.
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