A
female
age
41-50,
*aisy0347
writes:I met this guy through my ex n we were seeing one another and things were going good. My kids adored him n he always had time of day for my kids....the moment i moved in he stopped sleeping in the same bed had nothing to do with my kids n we have been together bout two maybe three months....he is always outside with his friends he has no time for me and my children....he doesnt talk to his friends about me or nothing wont even show me affection but yet he tells me all the time he loves me...he chooses friends over me...i cook clean make dinner i do everything cuz i care bout him n wanna make sure i make him happy.....well now we live together n me n my kids live upstairs while he lives in the basement....his friends have nuttin to do wit me ....n they r always whispering or being secretive in the basement n tip toing around....what u think is going on...im 31 and he is 47
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (19 November 2012):
 I agree with Oldbag as well. You need to ask him to move out. And then you ought to end it, this is NOT working for you and your kids AT ALL, is it?
Bye bye dude....
You can do better.... much much better.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2012): "Am I being manipulated by my live in boyfriend?"
No, just used. Manipulating you would require thought and effort on his part, neither required to retain your services as live-in housemaid, laundress, valet, cook, and dishwasher.
"he tells me all the time he loves me"
Don't believe what he SAYS, believe what he DOES.
"n they r always whispering or being secretive in the basement n tip toing around....what u think is going on"
Hate to suggest the possibility, but perhaps he played up to you to get to your kids. You say he has nothing to do with them, but maybe they want nothing to do with him. Unfortunately, it is a not-unheard-of scenario.
In any event, incredibly poor judgment on your part as a mother to move your kids in with a much older, unrelated, virtual male stranger under any circumstances. Your kids should come first, not your love life (or lack thereof).
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (19 November 2012):
 Ditto, what oldbag said.
The only "question" - as I see it - is how long you will endure in this untenable situation....
This is classical "guy acts nice to woo girl until he's gotten her to move in with him, after which he can ignore her (and her kids, if she has one/some)" behaviour. Guys do it all the time.... with girls who will let them...
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, oldbag  +, writes (19 November 2012):
 Hi
Hes laughing, he has a full-time housekeeper and no relationship,he is still in effect single.Its a bizarre and rotten situation for you and the children.
Do you pay rent or towards the bills, whats the financial arrangement?
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