A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: i cant go for 2 days without sex without going completely nuts. my sex life with my fiance is great however sometimes i will pressure my fiance for sex, even if she is tired or feels unwell and afterwards feel horrible about it because when i am driven by my need for sex. it is all i can think about for the entire day until i get sex, my fiance is great and usually will give it to me once a day even if she isnt really that in the mood often she will only want a orgasm once or twice a week. does that mean she has a lower sex drive than me? she will often complain that i am too sexual. I know that often i am, but as soon as the mood takes me its like there is someone else in control. if i dont get sex i will often jerk off up to 5 times in a day simply because my mind keeps going back to sex. please note that all thoughts revolve around my fiance completely i am not even remotely interested in other women.main question really.. am i addicted to sex and will it be unhealthy for myrelationship with my fiance?
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fiance, in the mood, orgasm, sex drive, sex life Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2011): You're obviously a very highly sexed guy. A strong sex drive probably means you're verile and healthy. A lot of people don't seriously understand what that's like. Pressuring is bad but otherwise I don't see a problem.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2011): you do have a problem and it will destroy your relationship because it's making you behave in a very selfish way towards your fiance. why is it that when it comes down to your need to have sex versus her need to rest when she's tired or ill, then you have to win? that when it's your needs versus hers, yours wins? what gives you the right to put your sexual needs above her health?
It's this selfishness that destroys relationships. No one likes being married to someone who cares only about themselves. this kind of relationship sucks for the other person.
if you're just a selfish guy, then for goodness sake stop being so selfish. if you're unable to not be selfish because your sexual needs really are that strong, then you definitely have a problem that needs professional help. please see a therapist before your fiance starts to really resent you and shut down towards you.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (22 October 2011):
Yes, this is unhealthy. You should seek help. They have support groups for sex addicts. This is more than a high sex drive when it gets to the point that you can't handle going two days without sex and masturbate 5 times a day. Try looking around for groups in your area. It could help and they should be free.
P.S. It's really sweet that you think about her when you masturbate though.
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A
female
reader, chocoholicforever +, writes (22 October 2011):
You're *already* making it difficult for your fiance because you regularly pressure her for sex if she is tired or feels unwell.
so what you're asking - will this be unhealthy for your relationship? the answer is, it's ALREADY unhealthy for your relationship, and if nothing changes it will start to take a toll. It may take years to happen, but it's not uncommon when a woman is regularly pressured for sex by her partner, against her will, that eventually she comes to hate it, resent him and grows cold to him.
if classifying this as an addiction is what it would take for you to do something about it, then yes it is an addiction.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2011): yes this is unhealthy for your relationship because you're often pressuring your fiance when she doesn't want to. that's inconsiderate and disrespectful to her.
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