A
female
age
26-29,
*orrely
writes:I have friends, and a boyfriend. I'm only 15. Yet whenever I'm with people, I just don't enjoy it. I don't make an effort to talk to people, they talk to me but I just don't get why I don't like talking to them. Am I abnormal or just introverted?I feel like because I end up pushing people away by not making much of an effort to talk to them, I'll be lonely forever. And that makes me really sad.What can I do to change? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Sttudyo  +, writes (18 January 2011):
Ok, so if you're asking for professional tips or help, I don't think I have any. There are some exercises like NLP and stuff that say help you change your mentality. My personal opinion is that all of that is just crap.
If you're not liking your attitude and the way you are/behave, and you just realized it, that's the first step.
Second, realizing that you have friends, DO PLEASE make an effort to have conversations with them. After all, they are your friends and I'm guessing you trust them. You don't have to talk for hours. Just make small efforts and see how you feel about it before you even try to befriend new people.
Ever tried asking them what they feel about you being a quiet girl?
Good luck to you!! Hope you find something new within yourself!!
A
female
reader, sorrely +, writes (1 January 2011):
sorrely is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni do have friends, and i talk to them, but often i just don't feel like making the effort, so i don't. i love talking to my boyfriend, but his parents are insanely strict so we don't get to talk much any more. i am kind of shy and i just don't really enjoy talking to people. Thanks for your advice, and i realize it's a bad idea to not befriend people, so is there any way i can change this mentality i have?thank you!!
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A
male
reader, Sttudyo +, writes (31 December 2010):
The answer is simple: Talk to people.
I wonder how did you get a boyfriend if you don't talk to anyone?
I don't know if you are just spoiled and think everyone has to approach you or if it is that you are just too shy.
Anyway, you're very young, but after some time later in life you'll come to realize that having no social interaction and not trying to befriend people is a bad idea.
The only way to overcome this is to meet new people. Think of it as a fun game. You might like some of them and you won't like some of them either.
Just give it a try.
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A
female
reader, Outspoken1016 +, writes (31 December 2010):
 Why dont you talk to people is the question. Is it fear they wont like you or accept you? Or have not met someone who enlightens you?
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A
female
reader, Sally_A  +, writes (31 December 2010):
hi, first of all we need to think why is that happening?
was there any bad experiences in ur past? or maybe not a very good communication with ur parents? having trouble in any kinda way... school perhaps?
you should find if there is a part of ur life that is bothering you...
and if there isn't... than maybe you should try to think about the other people u're stop urself from getting to know them... is it always that way? or is it most of the time... and when u're feeling this way... what do you think of the people u're talking to? like... do u hate the way they look? smell? does they make you remember something that you don't like? or maybe u're scared of showing who you are(shy or ... yanno these stuff), affreid of what they might think of you?
the best way of dealing with this issue, if you think it's really affecting you and ur life (esp socially) than maybe you should consider talking to ur parents about it, and maybe seeking for a professional help(see a psychologist or a psychiatrist if necessary), it's not a bad thing to do, infact we might all benefit from seeing one...
best wishes to you and hope my answer helped you in some way...
take care
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