A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Im 20 and i'm not sure if i'm a virgin or not. I had 'sex' when I was 17 but we didn't finish and he didn't fully do it. I didn't even feel anything. Now all my friends think i'm not a virgin and my boyfriend wants to have sex but i'm going to feel awkward if i bleed again or if it hurts, i dont want him to think i'm a virgin because he will treat me differently. Should I be worried that he will know i'm a virgin or would I be able to have sex normally???Any advise for a newby? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (19 May 2009):
 No you are not a virgin, as pebble said....if a penis has been inside your vagina then this counts as losing your virginity. Rubbish sex is still sex I'm afraid, but at least you can be assured that you are not a virgin.
Why do you think this guy will treat you differently if you are a virgin? If you are going to sleep with someone they definately should care about you enough to not base their judegment of you on how many (or few!) people you have slept with!
The only advice I can give you is to use contraception (as in both condoms and birth control - one form is not good enough on its own). And just relax - make sure you really like this guy, and you feel comfortable around him. Make sure he really likes you too - sex is way better when you both have strong feelings for each other. Take things slow - build up to sex over a couple of weeks maybe by just using foreplay and finding out about each other's bodies. It will probably hurt again but this is just natural, any woman that hasnt had sex in a while will hurt a bit when she does get round to having sex again! The bleeding shouldnt happen again but if he is pretty large down there and goes in a bit too deep then you could experience some bleeding, but again this is normal and will happen to everyone at some point.
Try not to worry too much and if things feel right then this experience will be much better than your first time!
I hope this helps and good luck!
A
female
reader, pebble +, writes (19 May 2009):
 If the penis went in your vagina then you're no longer a virgin because 'technically' you've had sex (even if it was rubbish sex lol).It might hurt for the few times anyway so be prepared for a little pain, apart from that you're good to go!Hope it's better than the last time ;) Have fun!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2009): Well if you think he'd treat you differently then you should probably get a more mature person lol. I don't understand what you mean by saying that you've kind of had sex lol.
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