| A
female
,
*averick_tristan
writes: I was new in this country when I had this colleague who at first seemed to show interest in me. Being a foreigner who does not know anything on the people's attitude on this country, I am not sure if he's just being nice or he likes me. With doubt and fear in me, I've tried to keep distance with him. I've been with him for a year and only after a year that some incidents made us closer. Once in a company party, I got so drunk and he was the one who helped me throughout. He had been so gentleman who called my friends and made sure I'll be safe. After that, I already felt this thing with him. But since I knew he had a girlfriend I tried to control it. I would like to think that what he had done has some meaning but I assume that his gesture was just normal for he's my only division mate on that company party; that's why he had helped me. He once told me I had an admirer but when I asked him about that the ff day he refused to further the conversation. I told myself it could not be him since he had a girlfriend already. Once, I seek his help with my stalker. Right there and then, he helped me report it to the police and even accompany me home. He never leaves me until he's sure I'm ok. One day, I've learned he's leaving the country. I felt so sad and wished it's not true. Before he left I've even invited him for a lunch. On the same day, he gave me one of his furnitures for free. I consider that a precious remembrance. On his last day, he told me to keep in touch. With that, I sent him an email, after which I got disappointed for him replying only after a month. I knew it was not bec he was busy since i've heard he's sending mails to our other of mates. On my reply back, it again took him a month to send a reply. My friends are telling me to forget about him as if he really likes me, it wouldn't take him to reply that long no matter how busy he is and that he should have made a move before considering that we've been together for more than a year. Call it crazy, but I would like to believe all those things and other little things he had done to me have special meanings. I was like a teenager who dreamed that one day we'll see each other again and hoped that somehow he must have really liked me but was just hesitant since i kept a distance at first. My female friends say otherwise and maybe I'm just being so wishful that I have misinterpreted his good ways. Maybe its true that it is just his nature to be that kind. Now I'm confused, If I'll continue hoping since I know if I do so, I'll be expecting more and it would hurt me even more. Will I still hope that there's a chance between the two of us? If only someone could tell me that he likes me too and that he's just not being nice. I'm so stupid and dense on understanding people's ways. I've asked some of my guy friends and contrary to what my female friends are saying, they said the guy might have liked me too. One more thing that worries me and which lose my hope is that am not sure if he had broken up with his girlfriend. but I'm sure her girlfriend did not accompany her overseas. He's been away for how many months now and the more that I missed him. One thing that keeps me going is that he said he'll come back and I hate myself for feeling and hoping that things would be different come that day. My mind is saying to forget about him already and open my heart to the other guys who's also trying to win my attention. But my heart says the opposite.Pls help me. If someone could open my eyes that there's no sign that he likes me too and that there's no hope then maybe this early, I'll try my best to forget him and set him free from my heart.
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reader, pops +, writes (11 September 2005):
Your friend was being just that, a friend. If he wanted more of an relationship, he would have sent emails to you sooner. He obviously likes you, and cares to see you come to know harm. But, in western culture, that is often seen as simply living by the Golden Rule. Accept the fact that he is gone, and move on.
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