A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I just wish I knew how to fix things, but I honestly don’t know what to do. I feel like I’m just stuck right now. Yet another birthday is on the horizon and I don’t feel like I’ve accomplished anything. I recently lost a job that I hoped would be my career. I’ve taken it as an opportunity to go back to school and specialize a little more in my career field, which will make me one of the oldest students there.The thing that bothers me the most though is that I’ve never had a relationship. I wouldn’t say it’s for lack of trying. I have asked women out and have gotten a few first dates here and there. And in the instances where I try to get to know women first, I usually end up getting the “you’re a really great guy, but…” or “I’d rather stay friends” answer. I’m sick of being told that I’m only good enough to be a friend and nothing more.I’ve seen when women have been interested in other guys and they’ve been pretty obvious about it. I can’t say that I’ve ever experienced that. It’s a real confidence killer.All of my friends that are my age are married and are starting families of their own. Even my younger sister has had a few relationships and is currently in a long term relationship. It’s like my only consolation is to watch them live out the dreams that I had for myself.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2014): Aww bless your heart.
I too lost a job that I thought would be my career and went back to school.
It is tough to watch other people's milestones when you are still trying to get your ducks in line.
What I will say is find what you enjoy doing and do that to the fullest. This is a great way to boost your confidence, meet people with similar interests and attract women because lets face it; everyone is attracted to happy people.
A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (3 January 2014):
The only thing killing your confidence is you.
The amount of time you spend putting yourself down because you lost a job, being the oldest student, not having a real relationship, and watching your friends have a life...when do you have time to focus on your own life???
Stop staring at the tree (your problems), you are missing the beauty of the forest (Your life). Women say you are a great guy...Awesome!!!...They could have said you are an ass, a jerk, an idiot, or many other "confidence killer" things.
When you leave all the other useless problems alone, and focus on being a the best person you can be, things will fall into place. There are enough problems in this world, you don't need to add more to your life.
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