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anonymous
writes: Im so confused, I want my ex back but does he still want me?I broke up with my boyfriend about 3 months ago and I still want to be with me, but im not so sure of how he feels. Basically, it was long distance so after the split I only ever saw him on messenger. We chatted once about a month after the split and the I decided not to bother with him when I saw him online as I thought just what is the point, felt like I was hassling him.Anyhow, last week was his birthday so I dropped him a msn to say happy birthday and asked if we could be friends. He said that he'd really like that, but had to rush off. That weekend, he then started up a conversation with me on msn, and was acting like we had never split up. Usually he would be quite distant and uninterested when i tried to chat to him. The next day he started texting me and this has not happened since he broke up with me and we ended up chatting online again. I text him the following day and he even text me back!Now im all confused!?!?! Is he playing with me? Does he still like me? Is he genuienly making an effort because he wants to stay friends and because he dumped me waited for me to initiate it? I really dont know what to think, and I dont want to push it with him. I did ask him if he was seeing anyone and he said no. So...please help me people!Lots of love and thanks in advance x x
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2005): It sounds like you're more concerned with his wants and intentions than your own. It would be important to decide what you want and then, but only then, see if it matches what he wants. As a woman you have to try harder to be discerning. We tend to put everyone else's desires before our own, which inevitably causes some degree of despair. You are young and have the world of men awaiting your final word. Don't let other people's feelings towards you guide you in your decisions. If you truly want to pursue a relationship with this "cyber-dude", then just ask him. Overall, it's best to seek out what you want rather than fall victim to the choices of others. Be a strong woman, don't stand for playing games, or reading minds and motives. If you have decided what you want, then try to get it, but also be prepared for NO as an answer. If that's the case, then you have to decide if you really want a partner who says NO (especially if he gives mixed signals). You must know what you want and be ready to make sacrifices for obtaining it. You are in a great position to represent the integrity of all women, including yourself. Always remember that YOU CHOOSE what you want...and choosing him solely because he chooses you is not really choosing at all....it's settling. Good Luck.
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