A
male
age
41-50,
*eadinside
writes:My girlfriend said we were broke up. She still told me she loved me and still had sex with me then she told me she had sex with 2 people that were supposed to be my friends. How am I supposed to get over that. She also got back with me before telling me this and now wants to get married. What am I supposed to do in this case?
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2010): My advice would be, in a situation like this, DO NOT MARRY her, do not even continue your relationship with her. This will always be a terrible sore spot in your relationship, both with her and your "friends". It will eventually ruin your marriage, and then you'll end up paying child support and alimony. Save yourself a lifetime of heartache and jealousy, and move on.
A
male
reader, bharat mehta  +, writes (7 January 2010):
 I think, you both love each other, with highest degree of intimacy. It is her honesty in saying what she did. Please remember this meaning, sex is just for earning energy, but love relationship is for managing such energy by mutual agreement. So, you both can discuss and increase mutual intimacy by frank and open talk.
With best luck.
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A
female
reader, Cookie123  +, writes (7 January 2010):
I am in this situation, but I would be in the place of your ex girlfriend. If she initiated the break up I believe she could still have done it because she was hurt by losing you, but I doubt it. Seems like she broke up with you to have more freedom. There's a reason you guys broke up, you should both talk about that. If you broke up with her, I really do think you can't blame her for anything. She was looking for comfort and she was probably feeling a lot of pain at the time, and you weren't together, so you cannot make her feel guilty. However, your friends are still your friends, and depending on how close you are, you should really consider getting them out of your life. They used your girlfriend when she was vulnerable and completely betrayed you. However, she no longer had ties with you. It all depends on the situation. I think you should have a talk with her and think about what you want to do. Don't set yourself up to be hurt again, when you can find somebody better.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2008): Sounds like she was hurt and was trying to find someway to get back at you/close to you...I can imagine her feeling very hurt and rejected and sad and missing you. In this condition women can do a lot of strange things, a lot of them stupid, just to feel loved and beautiful. It's your friends that I'm more concerned with. They knew she was vulnerable, they knew that she might be feeling sad after you two broke up. They shouldn't have gone there, they should have put your friendship first. You and her had broken up, she probably slept with these guys to numb the pain. It might have been difficult for her to be intimate with a strange man, and friends might have seemed more easy for her.
She was single, she could do what she liked, sleep with who she liked. She wasn't unfaithfull, you two had broken up. Not nice to choose friends though, but probably they were the only people available at the time.. You need to sit her down and have a very long talk with her, not only about this, but about why you broke up, how did it make you both feel and why your together again. Don't marry her if you can not learn to forgive and put this aside. There are so many men on Dear Cupid, who get married to women, never forgive them, and then 20years later come here crying about their wives past, saying I was robbed, I wish I'd never married her because I can't forget the past. If you can't accept and move on, then this is not the right girl for you, please let her go... Only be concerned with your future, if you keep the baggage of the past in your head, then you will be unhappy and you will make your girlfriend unhappy.
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A
male
reader, deadinside +, writes (27 December 2008):
deadinside is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni do love her with all of my heart and i dont want anyone else. She also still talks to one of them am i supposted to be ok with that or am i sopposted to be like thats fine talk to the guy u slept with
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2008): I think you should let her go
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female
reader, yourdestiny +, writes (21 December 2008):
I feel let her go if thats really what you want. If your questioning it then you might not care as much as you think. But she did it once, she will do it again and your realtionship will never be the same you will always see in your mind her sleeping with them which is very unhealthy for you. You have to think of yourself I understand its hard but like i said things will never be the same for either of you and she will never respect you as a man and vice versa. Please if you leave her dont treat all women bad because one broke your heart because believe me when I say there are good girls out there you just have to go through the bad seeds before you get to the right one.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2008): hi......deep down you know the answer. Your obviously distressed and who wouldnt be? You have been betrayed by two 'friends' and your girlfriend........ you may have been split up but she purposely slept with your friends with no concern at all for your feelings. Now she thinks she can play happy relationship again.Did you ever plan on having a wife who had slept with your 'friends'.... or do you think you deserve a wife you and those close to you can respect? You know the right decision, you can do better.......good luck!
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