A
male
age
36-40,
*evin33
writes:Hey everyone...So I have posted a few question regarding my situation with my girlfriend. We have been dating for almost 5 years and its has been amazing. I am 23 and she is 21. We have transitioned through highschool, proms, and life. We have dealt with a lot of change, but have got through everything. Last week we had a talk because she felt as though she didnt know what she wanted. Then in the end, she told me how much she cares and loves me and doesnt want to break up at all. She feels as though she is the man in the relationship sometimes. Its the type of love that doesn't come along all the time. It was love at first sight. And it only grew stronger. She came into my life exactly when I needed it. Only days ago she would tell me show much she missed me and loved me. It wasnt until she got a job, and started seeing friends again that she wants to see what else is out there. She thinks the grass is greener on the other side. I have done EVERYTHING for her and given her my all. Yet we still broke up on Sunday. I just can't believe its happening because I know its also not what she wants. She is just scared that she will not experience diff things. The hard part is that we are out first everything. Its such a bond to share. I can't get over her, I miss her sooo much. I wish she would just realize how amazing she had it. Its not like we grew apart or anything. The last time something like this happened i took her back, and the sparks were enormous. The breakup only lasted a couple weeks. This time I feel it will be longer.Im afraid to move on because I dont want to lose my love and feelings. And I dont want her to lose those feelings either. When she calls she still wants to see my and keep me there, because she knows her feelings are strong. I dont know how shes doing it. Its a love that I know I cannot find again. True Love, the kind that makes you a better person. I want to wait, but I dont know what to expect. Sometimes it hurts to wait.I need some advice on what to do...its so hard for me. Most guys would be like, ok see ya later, for what shes putting me through. Yet I want her back so bad. Thanks
View related questions:
broke up, move on, spark Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Kevin33 +, writes (4 February 2009):
Kevin33 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice..Helps a lot!!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2009): First and foremost, you can't loose love.. If it's real then it will survive. But you do have to let go sometimes.. True love means letting go and if its real it does come back. But you two are very young and she is right. It doesn't mean she wants to break up forever but would you rather you guys stay together a few more years, get married and then this happens? You both need other experiences. I met my husbad when I was 16. We broke up and went our seperate ways for 7 years and although it was heartbreaking at the time it was the right thing. We both got to live and become independant and only then did we understand what our love meant and we're happy today. From where you are now it hurts but in the long run it's for the best.And if the connection is as strong as you say it is, time and distance won't break it.. Trust me true love survives!!
...............................
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (4 February 2009):
She was your first of everything and she is all you've ever known.
No wonder it feels like the world has come to an end. I bet you feel you don't know how to function without her and in some way she will be feeling that too.
HOWEVER, that doesn't mean you should be together. Just because you've lived in a cave all your life, and then you get forced outside and it's all open and bright and scary, doesn't mean you should sit and wish to go back into the cave.
The thing that tells me that you two DO need to get out and see what the world has to offer is the fact that you were fine (ish) when sat in a room together, but as soon as she started to go out and look around, she felt desperate to escape.
Real, mature, love is when you go out and have lots of fun and do amazing things, and do those things with your boyfriend. When you know he is the one you want to be with because you have seen what else is out there and judged him to be the best.
I really think this is the best for both of you. Grow into your own people, don't grow into half a person because she is there providing you with half your personality.
Go out and experience life. If what you have is true then you will realise this and get together and live the dream.
Good Luck!! xx
...............................
|
